Dale Earnhardt Jr wants to kill me or...

[Cat Daddy]

........Why fear death?

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Racing season is almost here and the local supermarkets are promoting that fact.

At the local Kroger, they have put up life sized, cardboard pictures of Jeff Gordon and Little E in the aisles, hawking their sponsors and the products.

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I was at the store on Friday and happened to pass by the DE cut-out. I doubled back, got the attention of my roomie then took a run at him. I knocked him over, laughed about it, then picked him up and went on my way.....

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We went home, had dinner and about 11:10 thought about going to sleep. I looked at my roomie and told her that I was ready to go to sleep.

A few minutes later, I hear a thunk, another thunk and just as I think, "Oh, someone had an accident at the intersection........

BOOM.

The wall/window I am sitting next to explodes.

A millisecond later, I am almost in the dining room and my room mate is yelling "WHAT THE EFF HAPPENED?"

I said to her "I don't know." Then two seconds later I see the front hood of a car and know exactly what happened.

There is smoke, plaster, dust and all kinds of stuff flying around.

I am trying to get my wits about me and I then see the cat run into the kitchen, I hear my roomie get to the phone and hear the engine of the car running.

(Warning, I was stunned, ticked off and and more adrenaline pumping thru my body, every other word out of my mouth was F or some variation of the term.....I think that I will find some F-Bombs still scattered about the mess. So when you see the letter "F" you know what I mean?)

I am standing by this point and I think this guy is trying to back the car out of the house, So I grab a 2x4 and slam it on the hood and yelling at the guy to turn the F'n car OFF......


Nothing.


I yell a few more times and fearing a fire or some other crazy end to my life I make it over some junk, open the driver door and reach in to turn the car off. The driver is either wasted, dead or had some kind of seizure.

I was too stunned and too pi$$ed off to help the guy out of the car, so I made it outside to the front lawn where some neighbors have come out to see what had happened.

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The right side of my body hurts like heck, my thigh feels bruised and I have soom other incidental bumps.

I feel really stupid because I bailed out of the house while my roomie was on the phone w/911. But I knew she was OK because she made it to the back of the house and into the kitchen where the phone was located.

Still cursing like a sailor I sat down on the lawn while people asked me "WHAT HAPPENED?"

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I love the fact that people, while being well meaning, can as a question that has an obvious answer.


Answer?

Some idiot just ran his car into the front of house.

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The car is a white Chevrolet Lumina, that managed to punch thru the house and the only thing visible from the street is the rear end of the vehicle, the back tires resting on the foundation of the building.....

I have to take a break now, my whole body hurts, I need aspirin and I want to keep you all in suspense for a while...

I am going to try and post some pics of the incident, give me a minute?

Jr. doesn't know you're alive. Is this a cry for help?

[RICHARD]

Jr. doesn't know you're alive. Is this a cry for help?

Nope, it was revenge for taking him down in the grocery aisle. They have CCTV in the store and I am sure one of his fans/Kroger employees traced me down by my rewards card info and put a hit out on me...

[Karen]

That happened to a friend of mine when we were in high school, thankfully her family lived on the second floor. The car ran off the road and into her house right below her bedroom while she was asleep right above where the car went. She woke up and thought we were having an earthquake and then realized "Wait a minute, we're in Massachusetts, we don't GET those ..." and then was fully awake and realized what had happened. Thankfully in their case, there were no tenants on the first floor so no people were hurt but the drunk driver in the car.

[Scooter's Mom]

Thank goodness you're all okay!!

[happylabs]

Holy Crap is right!!! We see this on the news here at least once a week it seems that a car goes crashing into a house. Why is this happening so much?

Please tell us the rest of the story......

[RICHARD]

Here is what happened to the Ed and Tucker..

Ed was sitting on the back of D's chair, the impact knocked him off the chair and into the pile of stuff.....

His collar got knocked off in the excitement and I found him sitting under the bed, stunned and not really wanting to get out from under there.

Tucker ran down the stairs and into the basement - a place he usually stays out of.

We had to pack them up and go to a hotel for the night. The cops, fire dept. and ambulance wrapped everything up at about 2 a.m..... When we got settled there the dog barked at every noise and since the airport next door - a hub for UPS - they begin to send out planes at about 4:30 a.m.

I think I heard every single one taking off.

We slept on and off and spent a very restless night, tossing and turning.....

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On Saturday, we went back to the house, the FD helped us out by putting plastic sheeting across the opening, so we called a handyman to put some ply-wood over the hole. It needed three sheets of 4x8 foot plywood to cover the gap.

On Sunday we went back to start the process of cleaning up, I am amazed and totally puzzled by the lack of injuries and thankful that it wasn't more serious.

I saw pieces of wood that were six to eight feet long, some with five inch framing nails sticking out of the ends, pieces of wood that had spintered into 12, 16, 20 inch long spears and thank god that no one was impaled.

There were three double hung, double paned windows that were on the wall the car hit and they pivoted toward the other side of the room, away from us.

The lower part of the outside wall was brick, not the facade brick, but real honest-to-george bricks that flew into the dining room, about 35 feet, D pointed out a box of envelopes that were on the shelf that landed, unopened against the wall.

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The path the driver took was a pretty wild one too.

The house is on the cross bar of a T-intersection. He came off the main drag, ran up on a neighbor's lawn for a bout 50 to sixty yards, flew off the curb, across the street, up our curb and ran up our lawn.

The craziest thing?

The tire tracks ended at the walkway that curbed up to the front door.

He had compressed the suspension of the car when he went off the curb across the street, up our curb and finally the slope of the lawn launched him into the house, right at the edge of the cement walkway.

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I have always thought that people, who are in accidents or some kind of other trauma, who use the terms, "it was like a warzone" or "I thought a bomb went off" were being overly dramatic.

I have never been in a warzone or near bombs going off, but I do know that that was one of the most violent events I have ever been in and would not wish that on anyone, period.

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I almost died last April and this past Friday dodged a major bullet.

I think I have seven lives left, but am really not interested in finding out just how many.

I can't answer why or how I am so lucky--I did tell the fire man that I felt like I was F***y, a contraction of the term Effin-Lucky.

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So tomorrow the insurance company and the contractor will be back at the house, to begin the process of getting us back into the house.

For the record, the people at State Farm Insurance have been great, I know that some people may have had a bad experience with them or another company, but until then?

I guess I'll have to let you know what happens....

[Lady's Human]

If it was a red Lumina I'd have thought Dale Jr. was out to get you.

Being that it's white, I'm not so sure, Junior don't roll without a sponsor!