Honest advice needed

**lvpets2002** · 05-26-2011, 04:15 PM

What is this women's problem!! Didnt you say she is getting married in July.. I would tell this woman's soon to be husband about what she is doing && yes then tell your boss too about her sexual comments.. Crazy Lady for sure..

**pomtzu** · 05-26-2011, 04:33 PM

Since you say that she is new, it would be my guess that she is trying to make friends, tho she obviously is going about it in the wrong way. Seems it should be Bill, and not you, that needs to take action and just tell her outright, that he doesn't appreciate or want her unsolicited advances/attention. If it hurts her feelings - oh well.
And since this is a small office, and everyone seems to know everyone else, I seriously doubt that anyone would believe any rumors or lies she might want to spread about Bill. Afterall, she is the newbie, and anyone that knows Bill, would know that they aren't true - correct?

**momoffuzzyfaces** · 05-26-2011, 04:58 PM

Whenever she starts up, bring up her fiancee. Ask about him and what he's like. Ask about her upcoming wedding and things like that. Keep reminding her she is not available and neither you or Bill are interested in anything beyond office friendship. Be polite but don't encourage her by asking her to lunch with you or go any where else with you.

There was lots of trouble with the office I used to work at when people wanted to be friends outside of work. People told things about others that was no one's business. (and even made things up) I since made it a policy to be nice and friendly to people I work with but after hours are off limits. I was there to work not socialize. It kept my life a lot simpler.

Oh, and if Bill is married or has someone special in his life, he should talk about them ad naseum when she is around.

**Marigold2** · 05-26-2011, 05:07 PM

Thank you for the excellent advice.
I will do just that, ask about her fiancee and I will give Bill the same advice.
We want as little as possible to do with her and hopefully she will not stay too long.
Thank you again.

Originally Posted by momoffuzzyfaces

Whenever she starts up, bring up her fiancee. Ask about him and what he's like. Ask about her upcoming wedding and things like that. Keep reminding her she is not available and neither you or Bill are interested in anything beyond office friendship. Be polite but don't encourage her by asking her to lunch with you or go any where else with you.

There was lots of trouble with the office I used to work at when people wanted to be friends outside of work. People told things about others that was no one's business. (and even made things up) I since made it a policy to be nice and friendly to people I work with but after hours are off limits. I was there to work not socialize. It kept my life a lot simpler.

**momoffuzzyfaces** · 05-26-2011, 05:12 PM

Oh, and if she brings up sex, just ignore her like you don't hear her and change the subject. If she asks why, tell her what I do, I think people's sex lives are no ones business but their own and am not interested in hearing about them.

**moosmom** · 05-26-2011, 08:37 PM

Karen's right. It IS sexual harassment. That's the first thing I said when I read it.

I'd steer clear of BOTH of them. That's just MHO.

**dab_20** · 05-26-2011, 09:48 PM

It is sexual harassment. The first step to solving this, however, is for Bill to frankly tell her he isn't interested and doesn't appreciate her advances. This is the simplest way to go about it. As much as you may not want to seem rude, being adults, you just need to be frank with her IMO. Although you can talk to the manager about this, the first thing he or she is going to ask is whether Bill has talked to her about it.

It's hard to deal with people like this, especially because most people don't want to come off as rude, no matter how disliked this person is.

Good luck to you and Bill with this crazy lady!

I also agree, remind her of her fiancee, ask about her wedding. Encourage Bill to talk about in ladies he may be with.