I met her through a mutual friend and the three of us would get together at first, the two women were going to classes together. Then my friend moved away and she sort of became a fixture here. Her family did not like her and she could not stand them.
It was a slow process but I felt for her and the more she said people were uncaring and only out for themselves the more I wanted to prove her wrong.
She ended the friendship as she ends everything by pushing people away and accusing them of being uncaring and mean and only out for themselves.
As for her weight it didn't bother me so much as it was so hard for her. It was a good lesson for the kids growing up to not judge people by their weight. However when someone is that incredibly heavy they just cannot sit any where, chairs break, they get stuck in chairs, cannot fit into booths, have to sit down every few minutes and they smell. She fell twice flat on her stomach and could not get up and I could not lift her. The first time was in her kitchen and it took the two of us several hours to get her back on her feet. It was horrible. She was scared, in panic mode, would not let me call 911, she had to rest over and over and over again while she tried to roll over onto her back and finally I moved a heavy chair and she could halfway pull herself up, the second time I won't even talk about. I am not being mean here just honest. I would go with her to exercise classes 4 days a week then go off to work and she would go off to a resturant and stuff her face. She would eat portions that were huge and she would go out three times a day as she never cooked at home and didn't clean or do dishes.
Four hundred plus lbs is a lot of weight she didn't walk she shuffled and putting food in her mouth and being that big never seemed to resister to her.
When she sat in my kitchen chairs which are made of heavy wood the foot of the chair made an indentation on my vinyl floor. I didn't realize it till later so I had to have her sit elsewhere. What can you do.
The over eatting was a sign of her general unhappiness. I know that I tried to be there for her but it is hard. No one wants to be alone but if one is mean and vile and pushs people away no matter how patient and hard you try they are somewhat determined to win the battle.
I don't know................ I tried to be there for her for over 15 years and nothing changed, she lives in a fantasy world because the real world is too painful I guess.
I just find it so sad. It's kind of like a wasted life. One that revoles around food and hate.
Quote Originally Posted by pomtzu View Post
You say that she's the one that broke the friendship 6 years ago. Why didn't you break it long before then, if she was all that terrible? If she hasn't changed, then you're in for more of the same. You dealt with it in the past and didn't seek to break from her, so what makes it any different now? Now if you had been the one to break it 6 years ago, I could understand, but you didn't.