there is no way I would NOT walk across that stage. To me it's the final "I did it!", and a chance for my family and friends to help celebrate my accomplishment. Plus, it's the last time you'll see some of your classmates. Sure you have to sit through a few hours of ceremonies, but you had to sit through countless hours of classes beforehand just to get to this point. After this, it's done. Over. Kaput.

In this case, I think it all boils down to how much everyone wants to keep peace with the in-laws. If you have a good relationship with them and really want to keep it that way, then I would pay the fees for him and call it a "gift" or tell him he can work it off later. Or if he discusses it with them, they can offer to pay the fees instead if it's that important to them.

He's young. He's got plenty of time to live his life, a few hours of well-earned celebration won't cut into it much. However if he flat out refuses it's between him and them.

My sister-in-law has graduated from a couple different schools in the past few years and every time I went to her graduation, it took me back to my own. I really missed all the pomp and ceremony associated with it.