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Thread: Annoying habit

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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2000
    Location
    Windham, Vermont, USA
    Posts
    40,862
    I don't call Paul's mother Mom, never have. Love her, and the reverse is true, what we call each other has nothing to do with that.

    I agree with those who said the acknowledgment of someone speaking to you is an upbringing things, so just gently remind her from time to time, and don't make a big deal out of it, okay? I am sure she means no disrespect.
    I've Been Frosted

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    SE USA
    Posts
    18,443
    I don't think it is done in disrespect either... it is all how we were brought up. Some would look at someone who responds to everything a person said to them as having to have the last word.. You just never know... it is all in how we are brought up.

    Never called a mother in law Mom either, my daughter in law don't call me Mom.. my feeling are not hurt, she has a mother is how I see it. She does address card and stuff to "Mom" and I sign the stuff I send her as "Mom". She talks to me about stuff she could never talk to her own Mom about and that makes me feel better than her ever calling me "Mom"..

    Here's a funny for you. When I first came to Louisiana and married, my mother in law hugged me the first time we met.. I was horrified! What was that woman doing hugging me?! She did it every time we saw each other and it took me YEARS to be comfortable with it.... it is a southern thing, nothing I was brought up doing. After awhile, I came to love those hugs from her and other southern people and now I am the one that hugs everybody first!

    Really, it is just what you are brought up to do or not do.

    Special Needs Pets just leave bigger imprints on your heart!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Wyoming, USA
    Posts
    4,102
    I will never call my MIL "Mom" ... she's not my mom. I only have one mom, who raised me. No one else earned that title.

    I agree with others ... I would find it incredibly annoying if someone acknowledged every sentence I said. If you are having a two-way conversation and making eye contact, I take that to mean the other person is listening.

    And if you are speaking paragraphs, and getting no response, then it's really not a conversation anyway. I would take that to mean the other person isn't interested in what I am talking about.
    "We give dogs the time we can spare, the space we can spare and the love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made" - M. Facklam

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  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    STL
    Posts
    711
    I totally understand the lack of response being frustrating, but like others said, it could be her upbringing. My family ALWAYS responds with something. I'd probably call her out on it. If its that frustrating, it'd drive me nuts till I found out the reasoning behind it.

    I would never call my MIL 'mom' either. I won't even call my dad's 2nd wife my 'stepmom'. Since they divorced when I was 16 and he didnt remarry until a couple years later, she's never been a mother figure to me. Maybe if my mom wasn't such a big part of my life, and my MIL was a mother figure to me, then I'd consider it.

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  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Tabbyville, PA
    Posts
    15,827
    I called my mother in law "Nan", which is what the kids called her. I call my father in law what the kids call him too. I never felt comofrtable calling them mom or dad. So I wouldn't be insulted over not being called "mom" myself, just so long as whatever name used is said with respect.

    As for not acknowledging my statements, I'd find it annoying, but if its consistent, I wouldn't worry about it. My own dad doesn't acknowledge what's said too often, so I guess I'm used to it. I'll tell you what's annoying is when you ask him a question and you don't get an answer until 5 minutes later! The question could be as simple as "Are you hungry?" and you wait and wait, til you give up and start doing something else, then the answer "nah, I ate sonething a little while ago" He is what he is!

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