Quote Originally Posted by rosethecopycat View Post
Gayle, the similarities in our situations are uncanny. I am so sorry that you were ever struck, even once. Nobody deserves that. Ever.
That is the only thing my husband has proven consistent and true. He was never violent.

I too, have been in deep, deep despair.

I too, found a anniversary card.

May I read it?

Sometimes when I look at you I can't believe you're mine.
I still feel the same excitement that I did when we first met.
And I know that no matter what happens, that spark will always be there.
It's so wonderful to know that sharing love with the same person doesn't have to get old or boring, that it can keep getting better and stronger all the time.
And it's wonderful to know that I share that kind of love with you...
and always will.
(in his own hand follows)
Happy 10'th Anniversary
Rose!
I love you forever.


That was 18 months ago.
Now, those are all the reasons he's siting that he wants to leave. Oh, and yeah, I forgot, now he wants kids. (I'm 48)
What kind of man, if he never felt like that card says, goes into a store, picks that card out and thinks: yeah, that's the card I'll give her!

At the end of July, he joined the Army National Guard Reserve (at the age of 39) to secure health insurance (for me)
It was a lifeline as my health premium was $1000 a month, for me alone.
Soon I will have no coverage, RA as a preexisting condition and no hope of paying the premium as I am severely underemployed now.
My nagging question is: why would he join the Guard if he was so unhappy with me?

Somewhere around that time, I think that other woman entered the picture. She is married as well, getting a divorce.
She is a predator.
I too am asking myself how things could go so wrong since then.

Gayle, I hope you can at the very least can feel some relief, and some safety now. I know you're going to feel all the other things too, like,
grief, sorrow, anger, despair and the feeling like you are on the verge of tears for sometime to come.

I pray you have some support system in family and friends.
I know how important connecting with people is, as I don't have any family, and am completely alone. No parents, no children, no brothers or sisters, no aunts or uncles.

PT folks, just imagine if everyone you have contact with was suddenly gone.
Please reach out to your loved ones, and work on your relationships.

As mine didn't deserve any work, I guess.

Rose

Oh Rose I wish I could reach out across the miles and give you a great big hug. I've been contacting those women with whom I was friends before that wasn't allowed any more. They've been great, telling me it's about time I took out the trash. I also have my parents total support and they're providing me the funds to divorce him. I don't know why either of our men did what they did, but they don't deserve us (can you tell I'm having a good day today???). We are too good for them. You're a good, decent person, you will find a way thru this difficult time and come out smelling like (guess what??) a Rose. Hang in there girl, I'm with you all the way. We can do this. I will PM you my direct email address. If you ever need to chat we can go that way.