Why doesn't your family draw names and then they only buy for that person? This would exclude the children though.
I am in the same boat. And I know his family will get us TONS of stuff. They always do and we get them a gift card. One for each of them (except his nephew, we get him toys). I always feel so bad, but they know they do not have to do that. It is their choice and they do not expect the same in return. I think everyone knows how tough times are right now and they shouldn't expect too much from anyone this year, IMO.
This year I am getting gift cards for everyone. I might get specific things for the kids if I know what to get them. But they are getting older and it's getting more difficult to buy for them.

Katie, you do what you CAN do. Don't worry about what they are doing and getting for you. You can only do what is within YOUR budget. I am sure everyone would understand that. And like Cataholic said - if they don't then they don't deserve anything (that might sound harsh, but it's true).