I am so sorry to read of all the stress you have been having in your life,i have had my share like everyone else, but they are pale in comparison, i think you have had enough, you poor thing, i can only imagine how hard it has all been, i am a highly stressed individual myself, it does not take much to make me feel that way, but gosh you have had so much, you must be stronger than you think my dear, to come through all that, i can only hope and wish for better times ahead for you and that you can retire as is your wish and soon, take care and giant gentle hugs to you.