Dear Phred...

[Edwina's Secretary]

Dr. Nilsbokken, world famous psychobiologist, wriggling frantically in sympathy with

[zippy-kat]

red stilettos, black feather boa, and classy Claire Clam in his shirt pocket. Claire.....

[smokey the elder]

Originally posted by Randi
Apparently Kumquat isn’t a Phred word, I just HAD to check it out, never having heard of such a thing before. But there are some interesting aspects to this. Perhaps it’s Kumquats that are precursors for Triffids?


Kumquat
Scientific Name: Fortunella sp.
Family: Rutaceae

This kumquat is only 2 feet high. It was planted last fall.
(…and will probably be about 10 feet high and hungry by springtime!)

Recommended Temperature Zone: Sunset
(The twilight Zone?)

Growth Habits: Censored

Watering Needs: Needs adequate soil moisture for healthy growth and good fruit production.
(Clam juice not recommended!)

Cultural Practices: Easy to care for, takes well to pruning. Needs to be fertilized regularly for optimal growth and good fruit production.
(OK Cinder & Smokie?)

How are Kumquats used?
How good is your imagination? They can be used in as many ways as your imagination will allow! Kumquats are best when they are fully ripe from December 15th until April 15th

john

Maybe you can use them to pay your taxes.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

To re-cap and re-zoom our story...
Pappy Triffid, wearing red phireman's boots, is peeking around the bed room door as SmokeyMutt rolls his prize kumquat into the room. The kumquat is Dr. Nilsbokken the world's famous psychobiologist who is wearing red stillettos, a black feather boa and has stuffed Claire Clam in his pocket.

Claire has been clam-napped!!! She didn't realize she was the darling of the Triffid and Kumquat world. Help! Help! she yells.
Does someone help poor Claire Clam? Who will turn out to be her hero? .... Suddenly ...

[wolflady]

How on EARTH did I miss this thread! What great entertainment!!!

....
to continue with the story...
Claire has been clam-napped!!! She didn't realize she was the darling of the Triffid and Kumquat world. Help! Help! she yells.
Does someone help poor Claire Clam? Who will turn out to be her hero? .... Suddenly ...

a deep and dark voice from the netherworld resounds: Who knows what clam lurks in the pocket of Dr. Nilsbokken???



The Shadow knows!!! Muahahahahahahaha....

[Corinna]

As the Shadow stands ready with his red sauce ready , his 2 faithful shepard dogs stand ready to catch the clams as they jump from the Doctors pocket in to ..........

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Corinna
As the Shadow stands ready with his red sauce ready , his 2 faithful shepard dogs stand ready to catch the clams as they jump from the Doctors pocket in to ..........

... the net held by Pappa Triffid that he found in Phred's closet while looking for phiremen's boots. Pappa Triffid and the the clams make a break for the door. Suddenly ...

[gini]

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces

... the net held by Pappa Triffid that he found in Phred's closet while looking for phiremen's boots. Pappa Triffid and the the clams make a break for the door. Suddenly ...

Phred reappears just in time to.......

(Where's Phred been? All hell has broken lose in his house, his closet and he doesn't do nuttin!)

[Cinder & Smoke]

our saga marchuz on...

... the net held by Pappa Triffid that he found in Phred's closet while looking for phiremen's boots. Pappa Triffid and the the clams make a break for the door. Suddenly ...

Phred reappears just in time to...

... Spot da muddie Kumquat Trakz Smokey left onna rug as he rolled hiz Prized Giant Kumquat into the kitchun, where Boots, da Kat, iz poized to toss down frum the kounter the Lektrik Kumquat Opner.

sez Phred...
<Oopz> sez Smokey...
<OMG!> sez Boots...

NUTZ! ses Poppa Triffid as he tripz ober Phred's big footz blockin the door.

"Whut da..." sez Cinders, who'z just scampurin up the frunt stepz, as a giant ball a Triffid Rootz, Klamz, an Red Fiur Boots katapultz out da door.
Poppa Triffid recoverz quicklie, grabz da Klam Net, and dashez off leaving distinktive boot printz - kuz he gotz da Big Red Bootz onna wrong rootz .

Meenzwhile, Floppie Earz da Jack@ss has jumped da fence an gallupied round da howze an meetz up wiff Poppa Triffid, who...

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke



... Spot da muddie Kumquat Trakz Smokey left onna rug as he rolled hiz Prized Giant Kumquat into the kitchun, where Boots, da Kat, iz poized to toss down frum the kounter the Lektrik Kumquat Opner.

sez Phred...
<Oopz> sez Smokey...
<OMG!> sez Boots...

NUTZ! ses Poppa Triffid as he tripz ober Phred's big footz blockin the door.

"Whut da..." sez Cinders, who'z just scampurin up the frunt stepz, as a giant ball a Triffid Rootz, Klamz, an Red Fiur Boots katapultz out da door.
Poppa Triffid recoverz quicklie, grabz da Klam Net, and dashez off leaving distinktive boot printz - kuz he gotz da Big Red Bootz onna wrong rootz .

Meenzwhile, Floppie Earz da Jack@ss has jumped da fence an gallupied round da howze an meetz up wiff Poppa Triffid, who...

.... drops the net and sends klamz flying. Poppa lets out a scream and klopz off in da other direction because Floppie Earz da Jack@ss thinks Poppa is a clump of hay wearing phireman's boots and wants to eat Poppa. Da klamz stagger around dizzily having hit their shells together and knocked themselves silly.
Meanwhile ...

[Barbara]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by wolflady
[B]
How on EARTH did I miss this thread! What great entertainment!!!

....
I agree -I suppose the title "Dear Phred.." did not have enough information in it. It's a pity there is no clam juice over here. And an anchovy could be way too dead for my boys. But of course they ask for any fish stuff we prepare here: salmon, smoked local "renken" that we get from a fisher here at one of the lakes (Filou helps to skin it), shrimp, of course they would like lobster if they got it and as far Filou is concerned he even checks Thai Tom Yam Gung (He's South East Asian in his heart)

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

Sorry MOFF, I'm not creative enough to continue the story, but I was just wondering....


It's been almost a month now since the klam juz showed up at Phred's house and not only Boots the Kat, but Cinder
and Smokey rejected it and it was left, with the cap tightly on, in the refrigerator. Ever since then we've been trying to figure out what Phred should do with it....but we haven't heard what ever actually happened to it. Are the squished clams still in Phred's refrigerator? Did they get out and turn into Triffidz? Did Phred acidentally drop the jar when trying to get rid of it and the whole house has passed out from the stench?

Pleeeaaasssseee....we gotta know....what happened to the klam juz??!?!?

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Tubby & Peanut's Mom

Pleeeaaasssseee....we gotta know....what happened to the klam juz??!?!?

As far as I know it's still lurking in the back of Phred's fridge. That's how the story got started. We were all giving 'helpful' hints as to what to do with it.
Only the SHADOW knows for sure (aka Phred)...

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by Tubby & Peanut's Mom
Pleeeaaasssseee....we gotta know....what happened to the klam juz??!?!? [/B]

Yur askin us????

Last thing we hurd wuz...

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces
.... drops the net and sends klamz flying. Poppa lets out a scream and klopz off in da other direction because Floppie Earz da Jack@ss thinks Poppa is a clump of hay wearing phireman's boots and wants to eat Poppa. Da klamz stagger around dizzily having hit their shells together and knocked themselves silly.
Meanwhile ...

That putz da Klamz stumblin round inna frunt yard, wiff Poppa Triffid tryin ta gather em up whilst dodgin his Trustee Steed Floopie Earz da Jack@ss, who'z trin ta *EET* Poppa...

Den we gotz da preevius rumer dat derz CASEZ a Klam Juice frum Edwina inna klozet !

Jest last week Dad tried ta pawn off da Jug a Klam Juz, onlee slightlie uzed, onna guyz that steal our stuff offa curb ebery week - but dey had a big sine onna truk whut sed "We Take NO Klamz!"

Kat'z alluz leanin inna fridge tryin ta *grab* hiz bagga Temptations - we'll get him to see if ennie Klamz are left in der or they all got out wiff Klaire.

[smokey the elder]

Maybe the "people who steal stuff off the curb" won't accept Klam Juz because it's considered toxic waste! Maybe Phred should get someone who's Hazmat trained from the FD to dispose of it for him...