They came and took him! What do I do now? *UPDATE PAGE 5!*

[sumbirdy]

This is the last post I will be posting on this thread unless something drastically changes. I have to face the fact that Nathan is more than likely never coming back (not even to visit) and also that he is Charles' child and Charles will have to deal with the emotional problems of a little boy who never feels a mothers love and sees her scream at his father (and more than likely him) and lash out and hit. The system (child welfare) is so screwed up. We had told them we seen her abuse him in November but they said it "has to have been more recent" so basically he has to be hurt before they will do anything. They've heard things from countless people (even people who work for them) that have told them how she is and how she cannot control her anger and how she is violent but overall it is up to the person that is over everybody to say if they go get him...and she says no. Basically he has to be beaten first. This place obviously doesn't look at emotional abuse. If you had seen Nathan when he was living here and then again yesterday you would have seen a big difference. It is obvious, so incredibly obvious, that he is not happy and that he has already been emotionally abused. Now it is only a matter of time, when Stephanie thinks it is all over and she is no longer being watched, that the physical abuse will start. (Well, actually, continue since it already started when she was living with us) It is up to Charles to protect him and keep his safe and I'm not sure that he will.
I'm going to use my mental Backspace button to delete Charles from ever being my brother and Stephanie from ever entering my life. But I cannot delete Nathan. I will think of him everyday, I will always worry about him and what she has done. Please keep Nathan in your prayers. Pray that she will not hurt him too bad (preferably not at all, but I know that she will) Please keep us in your thoughts as well, that we will move on, that we will continue to survive and live. Because honestly right now the thing I want to do the most is just go to sleep...and never...never wake up.

[joycenalex]

i am so sorry that this has happened. i will keep nathan and you and your family in my prayers

[Catty1]

I will keep you and Nathan in my prayers, Sumbirdy. I thought your Dad had applied for custody...I hope something can still be worked out.

Up around here, I believe that Family Services HAS to investigate a complaint, even if anonymous.

If you guys could go visit once again - hide a tape recorder. That might be the only thing you could do.

[Alysser]

Aw, I'm so sorry sumbirdy. Regardless, I'll still be thinking of you.

[Karen]

Keep that journal going, some day you'll be able to give it to him, even if you have to wait until he's 18.

We have a friend who one day, out of the blue, got a phone call. It was from his nephew, that his sister had had taken away by DSS years and years before. DSS was right to do so, she never took care of, barely fed, changed, etc. her kids, moved in with her brothers and expected them to do so. Well, 13 years later, our friend got a phone call, and his nephew had been adopted and raised by a nice family, was a teenager, and decided to try to find his uncles. They reconnected and have a nice relationship now.

[crow_noir]

*hugs*

I'm so sorry all of this has happened. I feel so scared for Nathan. For now all i can do is try and send protective white light for him and say prayers.

[crow_noir]

Hey, as i was emailing a friend (who's sort of part of a prayer chain) a thought came to me.

Would getting an investigative news source involved help? Sometimes they can be quite persuasive. Either local news, or something like 20/20. Usually these tiny organizations don't like these things going national.

I hate the spotlight and never would have considered this. I've seen it suggested to others in the past and have seen the wonders it can do. I know you said you'd stop at nothing to get him back, so i thought i'd throw this out there. I understand though if you don't want to go this route.

[sumbirdy]

Hey, as i was emailing a friend (who's sort of part of a prayer chain) a thought came to me.

Would getting an investigative news source involved help? Sometimes they can be quite persuasive. Either local news, or something like 20/20. Usually these tiny organizations don't like these things going national.

I hate the spotlight and never would have considered this. I've seen it suggested to others in the past and have seen the wonders it can do. I know you said you'd stop at nothing to get him back, so i thought i'd throw this out there. I understand though if you don't want to go this route.

Hmm...I don't know. I wouldn't even know where to begin on how to do that. I don't even know where our local news station is.

[Craftlady]

All local news stations have websites with email address for the reporters.

[sumbirdy]

Guess who's here?! NATHAN!!!!! Well, he's only here until Monday. Charles finally put his foot down and said that she can't keep Nathan away from his extended family (especially since we are the only family he has known for all his life) So he's here until Monday!!! Yay!!! I can't tell you how happy I am.
We're going to work out some arrangement. It's either going to be Nathan stays here for 5 days, there 10, he stays here for 5 days, there 7, or he stays here for 7 days, there 10. I don't know what it'll be. But this is better than nothing.
He has 7 teeth (two more from when he left here) and he can't take a couple of steps by himself. The only thing really different is that it's harder to get him to smile. I've attached pics and I couldn't get him to smile (before he would smile at anything) And he's got flea bites all over him. I think these five days will be a welcome break from all the screaming he probably hears every day. This way he will know there are nice people in the world and not everyone yells.
*Sniff**Sniff* I smell poo. I can't tell you how happy I'm going to be to change this poopy diaper. (Never thought I would say that)

[crow_noir]

* SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAM *

OMG!!!! *hug* *spinny hug*

That is so freaken awesome!!! I know it's not the best case scenario but it's better than bleak.

I'm all teary eyed and sniffly now. I'm SO happy for you all.

[Karen]

Oh, yay! Congratulations most of all to Charles, for realizing, and for putting his foot down.

[Catty1]

That is AWESOME!!!!!

I hope there will still be some charges against Stephanie...and/or that Charles realizes Nathan should be with you folks most of the time if he just can't give him the care he needs all the time.

I hope your dad informs DSH about the flea bites...and less smiling....

Does your family still have an application for custody?

[sumbirdy]

I am so happy too! Stephanie was all in fake mommy mode when mom and dad got him. ( I didn't go with them) All teary eyed and saying she will miss him and stuff. After 11 1/2 months of only seeing him about every 3 months or so (sometimes longer) and not even seeming to care when she was with him, she's not gonna make us believe this one. You don't just automatically switch from who gives a dang to perfect mommy. She tried to tell mom how to take care of him (like we hadn't raised him for nearly a year! And she didn't bother to ask us anything about him when they came and took him)
Anyway she's saying that she doesn't want him here every so often but Charles said that's the way it's gonna be and dang it we're going to hold him to it! Plus adult protective service was there to have a little chat with them and said they better make mom happy or they were pressing charges. I bet that scared 'em!
Nathan is so clingy now. Every time I try to put him to bed he cries and holds his arms up to me, so he's still awake (It's midnight here). I can't get enough of holding him.
We're having a late birthday party tomorrow.
Here's some more pics of me and him.
In the last one it looks like he's asleep but really he's just looking down.

[sumbirdy]

That is AWESOME!!!!!

I hope there will still be some charges against Stephanie...and/or that Charles realizes Nathan should be with you folks most of the time if he just can't give him the care he needs all the time.

I hope your dad informs DSH about the flea bites...and less smiling....

Does your family still have an application for custody?

I don't think she has any charges against her and Charles has changed his story about how good of a mom she is (from bad to great) so many times that I don't know what he believes anymore.

We talked to DHS about him not being as happy but they said they can't go get him because he's not happy.

Dad was trying to get legal guardianship but found out he can't do that unless both parents sign their consent (even if she was in jail)