Sweetie, i think you need to know there are people who genuinely care about you,i do for one and as you can see by your replies we really do understand how you are feeling, i agree your friend should be there for you in your time of need as well, that is what real friendship is all about, but sometimes people are so caught up in their own problems ,they just don't have anything left to give.

I really feel for you in your struggle in your life right now, and it sounds like you are overwhelmed by it all, I can only tell you that hopefully in time things will look better, you are in the grieving process right now, and you need to beable to do just that.

I want you to know that I am always here if you need a shoulder to cry on, i know i live very far away, and it is not quite the same,but i do want to offer you any emotional support that i can, so please feel free to pm if you feel the need.

Please take care of yourself,put yourself first for once, you are a very kind and loving person, who obviously puts others needs before your own, maybe now it is ME time,giant HUGS to you and i sure hope you feel somewhat better within yourself soon,anything i can do ,just let me know ok.