Hi, Ebberbuddie ~ Da Offis Kat is Back Agin!

Almos dint make da trip -
Dad furgotz it wuz my *pee*inna*kup* day.

Dad dun hiz chorez (my pillz, filled da krunch bowl, fulff'd da sandy box, an eben kooked me a kuppa Tuna waddur (kuz we had Mac 'n Cheeze 'n TUNA last nite!) (Sorrie Miz Zippy - he *likez* the stuff!)

Sumwhere in allua fussin round, he noticed the *prezunt* I dumped inna hallway ~
a G-I-A-N-T FURR-Ball; covered in brown slymie goo -
rite onna karpet!!

He wuz a lil .
I wuz purdy proud - Furst Wun I eber dumped!
Rather, furst wun he eber FOUND...

All hiz fault ennieway - I hadda wear the durn Lampy-Shade / Funnel thingie fur so long. Kunnit keep da fur kote shinin like I nornally do... Had a munth's worth a kleenin inna tummy all at wunst.
Sure felt gud ta unload it, tho...

He hadda kook up a batch a Oxy-Kleener and mop da pile up an flush it. THAT'z when he membered it wuz pee-test day. NUTZ!

Tossed inna kar wiffa Muttz {HEY - ya furgot my kuppa Tuna waddur!!} Wuzint lissnin...

Dint like the 'rangementz atta Shop...
Tied to da chair wiffa stringy leash;
No sand inna box -
jest a *squeekie* garbich bag an Wun thin sheet a papur;
*I* aint gonna pee in THAT thing!
Least he membered ta toss sum chikun bitz inna waddur kup.

Held out past wun a-klok. Got 6 sqwirtz frumma wadder gun.
Holdin tite at 2 a-klok. Six more sqwirtz inna mouff.
Still holdin at 3... Nudder 6 shotz a wadder.
Four a-klok = NO peez. Nappin INNA pee box.
Four:thurdy - STILL holdin...
I started *gurgglin* on the 4th shot a waddur.
Dad pikz me up an I'z *slosshun* inside.

He kallz Doc Mike'z Offis - they'z gud till 6 a-klok.
NUTZ! I kant wate that long! Gotta PEE!!!

Snuk inna box an dumped a purdy gud-sized puddel.
Dad dint notice till 5:thurdy.
OMG! He *PEE'd!!!

You'd think I made a bottel a wine!
He bagz it up an dashez off to see Doc Mike...
{HEY! Put sum sand inna box - I still gotta pee summore! He nebber lissinz!}

Dad come back liddel while ago -
rubbin hiz pocky-book an sayin "Owch!"
Seemz I STILL gotz sumpin inna Bladdur Tank - white blud cellz anna few pink wunz, too.
PH wuz gud, tho.
Got anudder 2 weekz a biotik pillz; more acid pillz (gonna be on them furever, I gess). Biotik dose is gonna be a pill anna quarter ebery day, this tyme.

Doc figgerz my "FLUDT" Kondishun iz makin sum *grit* thatz aggervatin my tank. I duzint plug-up ennie more kuzza the re-plummin Sir Jury dun on me. Iffin I'z still gotz the fekshun inna tank onna next test - they might havta do a $50 bukz "Kulshure" an try ta figger out whutz growin inna tank...

Dad sez fur a "Free" Kat - I'z startin ta get a lil *spensive*!
SmokeMutt'z happie azza Klam - Long as we keep pourin munnie thru my plummin system - He kant get sent out fur hiz Bum Knee Sir Jury job!

Dad finally put sum sand inna box ~
I wuz innit doin a *pee* affore the dust died down!
WHEEEEW! HO-BOY!
Wuz gettin reddy to find sum offis papurz ta take a leek on!
Memo to Self: Pee inna baggy-box SOONER, next tyme!

And so endz the Advenshurez of Boots, da Part-Tyme Offis Kat, fur dis week.
Mee-Ooow atcha all inna kupla weekz!

/s/ Boots, da Kat