hahaha
Gotten over "it"
hahaha
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I'm a nurse ... these always give me a smile!
You might be a nurse if:
-When someone asks to borrow a pen, you always have two or three on hand.
-When watching daytime TV, you throw something at the screen when the nurses do nothing but flirt with the doctors and answer the telephones.
-When watching prime-time TV, you throw something at the screen when the characters say or do something you know would never happen in the real world.
-You know what the July syndrome is.
-When waiting in line at the supermarket, you find yourself checking out other customers' arm veins.
-Your bladder is the size of the water tank on a Winnebago.
-You screen your calls on your day off, in case it's someone from the hospital calling to ask you to work.
-When using the sink in a public washroom, you scrub your hands for a full minute and turn off the faucet using your elbows.
-You can only tell time with a 24-hour clock.
-You know by heart the phone numbers of every late-night food delivery place in town.
-Eating microwave popcorn out of a clean bedpan is really no big deal to you.
-You can tell the pharmacist more about the drugs he's dispensing than he can tell you.
-In your favorite dream, you leave a grand mess at a patient's bedside, and tell a doctor to clean it up.
Praying for peace in the Middle East, Ukraine, and around the world.
I've been Boo'd ... right off the stage!
Aaahh, I have been defrosted! Thank you, Bonny and Asiel!
Brrrr, I've been Frosted! Thank you, Asiel and Pomtzu!
"That's the power of kittens (and puppies too, of course): They can reduce us to quivering masses of Jell-O in about two seconds flat and make us like it. Good thing they don't have opposable thumbs or they'd surely have taken over the world by now." -- Paul Lukas
"We consume our tomorrows fretting about our yesterdays." -- Persius, first century Roman poet
Cassie's Catster page: http://www.catster.com/cats/448678
Registered User
What happened when the cat swallowed a coin? There was some money in the kitty. (Groan...)
How many cats does it take to change a light bulb? Cats do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. I am not a person. So the question is not how many cats it takes to change the light bulb, but how long before I can expect light?
Praying for peace in the Middle East, Ukraine, and around the world.
I've been Boo'd ... right off the stage!
Aaahh, I have been defrosted! Thank you, Bonny and Asiel!
Brrrr, I've been Frosted! Thank you, Asiel and Pomtzu!
"That's the power of kittens (and puppies too, of course): They can reduce us to quivering masses of Jell-O in about two seconds flat and make us like it. Good thing they don't have opposable thumbs or they'd surely have taken over the world by now." -- Paul Lukas
"We consume our tomorrows fretting about our yesterdays." -- Persius, first century Roman poet
Cassie's Catster page: http://www.catster.com/cats/448678
THE HOUSE OF ORANGE
Who is more honest with God than children?
UNANSWERED PRAYER?
The preacher's 5 year-old daughter noticed that her father always paused and bowed his head, for a moment, before starting his sermon.
One day, she asked him why.
"Well, Honey," he began, proud that his daughter was so observant of his messages, "I'm asking the Lord to help me preach a good sermon."
"How come He doesn't do it?" she asked.
Gotten over "it"
The one about the man and the homeless bum
The homeless bum asks the man for $2,
HM) May I have $2 please, your genorosity would never be forgotten.
Man) Would you use it for booze?
HM) no, I swear I won't
Man) Would you spend it gambling?
HM) No, I swear.
Man) Will you come home with me? I want my wife to see what happens to a man who doesn't gamble and drink.
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