Kay, your point is well taken and I see it a lot, having a teenage daughter of my own. As long as she stays in school, keeps her grades up, plays her sports and helps out at home, I have no problem. She is a 15 year old girl who has not disappointed us at this time, and she is striving to get into college at a school with high academic standards. That is the most important thing for her to concentrate on at this time. BUT, I do hold her responsible for some of her outside expenses, even though she doesn't hold a job at this point. I just don't want to see that hand held out, all the time, for this or that, especially eating out and movies, when a meal is being provided at home. That is the kind of thing that she has to make choices about and use her own money to pay. She makes some money by babysitting, and yes, I pay her a measly allowance, every month. But, I buy her clothes, pay for sports expenses, buy her gasoline (as long as she is being responsible in where she is driving), and obviously pay all her other living expenses. I am proud of the choices my daughter has made and I have tried to raise her the way my parents raised me, to be responsible, with my education as the most important thing.

I worked in the summers from the time I was 14 years old. I rode my bicycle to work most days, when I wasn't a legal driver, and later either got a ride from one of my parents, or drove one of their cars, when it suited them. My parents paid for me to go to college, and I worked in the summers to raise my spending money. I did that all the way through college, and although my dad bought my first car, the summer after my Junior year in college, I also had to sign a note to pay him back for it, as soon as I graduated.

My daughter is more spoiled than I was, but she has earned that right, and I think that every child needs to learn responsibility and not just feel entitled to free room and board, without something in return.