Opinions...please help...

[caseysmom]

I don't think she was very close with her dad, all the remarks about him have been negative. I don't think its that, she has always been like this. I haven't seen her cry once for him.

My brother was a really sweet guy but for whatever reason they were not close, he may have gotten frustrasted, I know it was overwhelming for them all those years to have his son severely autistic.

[Catty1]

how about

start with a doctor's appt? For you at least, if not her.

That "protective custody" might have been your best option.

A set of rules, with the "PC" as a last backup option, might be a good try.

If nothing else, YOU get family counselling for yourself. You'll at least get info on all kinds of help. She could benefit from a life skills course.

Some things here you CAN do, and others need a professional edge.

A word on disabilities: My sister had ms for about 20 years, and died of it in April. One of the best things I learned was this:

"Having a disability doesn't make someone a saint."

If you are walking on eggshells, you don't have to do that any more.

I liked Catnapper's suggestion - actions (like the laundry dumping) show her what she CAN'T do.

Just make sure that whatever consequences you say- that you carry through with it, so she learns to respect what you say - that you'll do what you say you will.

I'll shut up now - good luck!

[caseysmom]

That protective custody seemed harsh at the time, I hadn't lived with her. I would like to see her finish her internship, graduate and get a job.

I have tried counseling with my teen, just seemed like I was paying a hundred bucks for a lady to sit and not and ask a couple of questions. Maybe I can try a different one.

I know I am part of the problem, I realize that. All day at work I have been feeling bad about the "pay me back for the contact stuff" note. I shouldn't feel bad but I do, I can't control it. I get angry when someone should already in my opinion know something and I have to say something and come off like the bad guy.

[caseysmom]

I forgot one little story...

We went out of town for 2 nights for my daughters diving, my niece did not want to go. When we got home I said "hi we are home, did you miss us?" She said flat toned "not really" I guess I left enough food with instructions

[I_luv_rusty]

I forgot one little story...

We went out of town for 2 nights for my daughters diving, my niece did not want to go. When we got home I said "hi we are home, did you miss us?" She said flat toned "not really" I guess I left enough food with instructions

Wow.. I'm guessing she didn't clean anything up??

It must be a handful with her in the house.. (((Hugs)))

[caseysmom]

I left her a note that said that the dishwasher was empty to rinse your dishes and put them in there. The dishes were put in there not rinsed at all.

Also it was on the 3 day weekend, we got home late sunday night, first thing monday she plunks down all her laundry in the hall.....I told her, you should have done that while we were gone now I have all of your and all of ours. she was doing her own laundry at home, I asked.

[caseysmom]

My husband called to tell my somebody broke into my brothers house...just what I needed Luckily they didn't get anything, they ransacked it looking for stuff. They tried to steal his car but luckily the batter was dead. I asked my niece 5 times to bring the car key here because it was in a closet over there.

I have calmed down a bit I was just feeling frustrated over the weekend, thanks for letting me unload.