I'm so sorry that your first post to Pet Talk was on the loss of Fluffy. That is how/why I joined Pet Talk too over three years ago when my Goldie died from liver cancer. It's so painful. Everyone grieves differently. Many of us here on PT have been there and share your grief. Go ahead and cry for as long as you need to. We're here for you. Fluffy is now at the Rainbow Bridge - probably playing with my Goldie and all the other kitties who have crossed over.