I am so angry it's not funny. I knew HE'd do it. Recall earlier I posted here about his conditions. I fulfilled all of my part. I apologized to his kids, etc. Now when it comes to the counsellor that we were to see until all was well, it won't happen. He says that there is no time in the schedule. Guess he really doesn't care to put this back together any time soon. I've been spending every weekend with him and a few days of the week. He's put it all on me. It is all my fault. We live apart cause he and his kids don't know when I will freak out again. Well isn't that nice. All of the fights are my fault. Yep, my fault he kicked in our bedroom door. My fault he spit in my face. Probably my fault that he drinks 2-3 beer on his drive home every day. And yes, he drinks and drives, with passengers, me and/or the kids. Thanks for letting me vent. I'm still real angry. I don't know what to do now.