Are you a party person?

[carole]

No i hate parties, going to them , having them,(although i am way more secure in my own surroundings, i would
feel nothing is good enough that i do) if an invite comes in i panic completely and get in a right state, but then i am social phobic, but it appears i am far from alone in that on PT,hate hate hate parties with a passion. I wish it could be different, it must be wonderful to feel happy and elated at going out to a social function, i so wish i could experience that once in my lifetime, I envey those who do.

Having said all that , alot of people would never guess i am that way and are quite suprised, i can hold a conversation one on one on problem at all, and most people find me friendly, but i am an introvert, my mother is the same, although worse IMO, honestly i believe it is genetic, i am lucky i have bred two children, especially my daughter who have not inherited my lack of socialising skills, infact Melissa i would describe as an extrovert, Scott somewhere inbetween, Hubby is also somewhere in between.

I believe alot of it comes down to lack of self esteem,and of course it is a fear like any other.,it is just very mis-understood, and is difficult for people to understand.

Jen i empathise with you 100 per cent, and understand where you are coming from, it would not necessarily be the people at the baby shower, it is really i believe down to you and how you are feeling about yourself at the time, from my own experience, i can handle some situations quite well at times and others i am a complete mess, even i cannot understand it myself, so no wonder others have difficulty with it ,please feel free to Pm me anytime, i have struggled with this all my life , but now have a inner peace with it all,because i have stopped trying to fit in and please other people, pick and choose my social events, which are far and few between, and only go to things i think i am capable of handling,although they say we have to face our fears to overcome them, for me that has not worked all my life, so now i am doing what is right and and comfortable for me and i am much happier and my anxiety is lifted because i do not feel pressured anymore, there are some things i just cannot avoid and must do,those are a challenge, but you cannot avoid some family outings and funerals that kind of thing, so one must do what one must do.

Take heart in knowing so many others on PT are like you and understand and wish to share and help you.

On a lighter note, that is why PT is such a great place for people who find it hard to socialise in public, here you can open up , be yourself and be the person you might want to be in person , if you get my drift, also a great outing for social phobics is the movie theatre, hidden in the dark, totally relaxed, oblivious to those around you, my fav outing.