Need drinking advice (Adult Advice)

**Catty1** · 04-26-2006, 07:30 PM

King - you certainly don't have to check in with a counsellor.

Just remember - you ARE an adult now, can choose someone YOU are comfy with(takes a few times, just like getting to know a person), and it's just the two of you - no lawyers or crowds. Just you.

http://www.stopbadtherapy.com/test/therapy.shtml

That's a link you might use IF you want to check out a counsellor - tells you what to look (out) for.

HUGS
Catty1

**carole** · 04-26-2006, 08:00 PM

King2005 i get what you are saying about counsellors, but just remember there are good and bad ones out there, it seems you have been unfortunate enough to get a raw deal with them and get the bad ones,maybe you should still consider it but really check out a good counsellor, usually by word of mouth is the best referral, but i know exactly what you mean, went to one myself once and did more harm then good ,anyhow I am pleased to hear you have met someone nice who neither cares whether you drink or not, and that you seem content and happy right now, good luck you deserve some real happiness.

**Cataholic** · 04-27-2006, 09:00 AM

Carole- uh, I am not sure why YOU have the 'right' to wax eloquent on the downside of drinking, making it personal to YOUR experiences, yet, chastise ME for doing the same, but from the opposite point of view. And, I might add that you spent about 80% more space ranting about what you claim I was doing, taking time away from King and her issues, than I did. I just pointed out that alcohol is not a necessary demon.

I am not limited, like all of us, to what I can and cannot post. So, keep your tirade against me to yourself, thank you very much. I am not sensitive about my drinking. I like my drinking. What I don't like is someone making anyone that drink some off the wall 'drunk'. That is not the truth. That is not factual. You made the same comment with Denise, and I responded in kind. Big deal. If you did it again, in another thread, I would respond. I don't understand why you are permitted this luxury, but, I am not?

I think it is doing someone a disservice to make it an all or nothing proposition. So, if King has asked for advice, I feel free to give it. From my perspective. Obviously, our opinions differ, that is life.

To me, and to those people I know, drinking is not an issue. In moderation, like most things in life.

**carole** · 04-27-2006, 06:37 PM

Johanna I am not even going to waste one more minute of my time responding to you, I am not going to hijack this thread.

King2005 i have pmed you back and am here for you anytime,thank you for confiding in me,my main aim is to offer you support. Take care.

**king2005** · 04-27-2006, 07:02 PM

Thank you carole.

**carole** · 04-27-2006, 07:06 PM

Anytime sweetie.

**Scooby4** · 04-27-2006, 10:02 PM

I understand EXACTLY what your going through. My direct family have NEVER been drinkers. I can count how many beers my father has drank on one hand and I am in my 30's!!! However, my brother is a recovering alcoholic and so was my grandmother before she died. Alot of my relatives are or were alcoholics and I know it does run in families. Drinking is something that I am clearly cautious and aware of.

Here's been the clear cut test in my life on deciding on drinking. I got drunk!

I mean DRUNK! When I was about 17 years old my older friends gave me some PGA (190 proof) and some other mixed drinks. I am 5'2" so it doesn't take much. I overdid it completely. I had "tunnel vision" and was completely numb. My friend who weighed over 200 pounds actually fell on me and I did NOT feel it! I was most likely suffering from alcohol poisoning at the time.

It was the WORST thing and feeling I had ever had in my life!!!
My point is that when I sobered up, I HATED the experience!!! It was the worst thing I could ever imagining doing to myself. It was at that point that I knew that drinking alcohol was NOT for me and where to draw my limits. 2 wine coolers at a party or some "special punch" is enough for me. Once I start feeling a "buzz" I STOP!
I think honestly, this is where the difference between "social drinkers" and "alcholics" draw the line. A "social drinker" drinks NEVER alone, with friends, and ONLY to a nice "buzz". An alcoholic consistently drinks alone, buys drinks or insist their friends drank with them, and always wants the "pain" to go away. Their "drunk experience" was something they enjoyed and found fulfilling. If you get drunk, and like it, then I would seek counseling. If you get drunk, and realize it's just NOT your "thing" then you should be okay for a drink or two on occassion.
I don't like beer or much alcohol at all. I do go to a bar by myself locally alone. However, I do meet up with other single women in the "same boat" as I am. We don't drink much if at all and spend most of the time dancing and socializing. I may drank if someone is buying to be "social" but not to get drunk. I may "nurse" a beer (in my case Smirnoff Ice) all night with a glass of water. Drinking two drinks and keeping a glass of water available is enough for one of my "wilder" nights.
If you do drink, make sure you have some food on your stomach. Eat some crackers or breads to absorb the alcohol better. An empty stomach will get you drunker faster and irratate ulcers. DO NOT drink milk! Alcohol and milk do NOT mix as many people may tell you. Milk actually makes MORE acid in your stomach causing you to develop ulcers or bleeding ones. Rule of thumb: "Beer BEFORE liquor makes you SICKER" If your going to drink beer, then drink ONLY beer. If you drink wine keep to wine. If you drink liquor (shots) then do it before you start with the beer. You can do beer and shots together but you may not feel so well later. If you do drink too much, then go dance it off or get some fresh air and move around.
Drinking 2 glasses of wine a day is still okay. However, I would do it with a meal or before bedtime with a snack. Wine is good for you and does help your heart. I just wouldn't want to drink it without something in my stomach.
You can "drink" just don't think you need to rely on it or that it will be something to solve another issue. It's can be "fun" and "healthy" on some levels if you keep it there on those levels. You may want to "experiment" on your drinking level at first but try to do it with friends at home while watching a movie. Maybe have a "party" with your friends bringing different bottles of alcohol to see which one you would like. That way you can decide when you get to a bar what you may or may not like.

It's much easier to have a "regular" drink lined up so you still can look cool and you know your limits on it.

**Cataholic** · 04-28-2006, 09:21 AM

Originally Posted by carole

Johanna I am not even going to waste one more minute of my time responding to you, I am not going to hijack this thread.

Oh, Okay, Carole!

(and, I think you meant, "other than this one last dig, I am not going to waste one more minute of my time"...)

**moosmom** · 04-28-2006, 09:51 AM

Okay, I was going to let this ride, but I've gotta say something...

This thread is not about you Cataholic, or anyone else that has responded. It's about King2005 and her wanting to learn how to drink. We have all shared our experiences with alcohol and what kind of impact it has had on our lives. King 2005 is a big girl. All we can do is be there for her. SHE'S the one who has a choice to drink or not to drink.

End of story.

**Pawsitive Thinking** · 04-28-2006, 10:06 AM

An emotive subject

**Cataholic** · 04-28-2006, 10:10 AM

I am so sick of this bullcrap. Donna, go back and read what people have written, they have shared THEIR personal experiences with alcohol. Some people have added their input about the effects it has had on their lives. Why in heck's name am I forbidden from doing the same? I will tell you why- because I have a DIFFERENT opinion than YOU, and, than CAROLE, on alcohol. Sorry, but, that doesn't make MY post any different.

If I had posted something like, "King, you should DRINK until you puke, it doesn't matter, it doesn't affect you, it won't make a single bit of difference" you, and probably others, would be all over it, correcting my 'errors', and telling me how irresponsible my post to King was/is. This isn't any different.

I think I posted two or three times, offering advice to King, and it wasn't until Carole decided to post one extremely LONG PERSONAL tirade against drinkers, making VERY irresponsible, and incorrect 'facts' about those that DO drink, did I comment on her post. AND, my post was a bit short, too.

King asked for advice, and I posted it- from my perspective. Until this becomes YOUR board (or, Carole's), I will post whatever in Heaven's name I feel like posting.

Johanna