I have a drink problem - Professional opinion

[Catty1]

Well...I hope this works. As someone said, you might only be a heavy drinker.

If you are alcoholic, you will not be able to have just one or two. You'll be back where you were sooner or later.

What's important is you find out what is true for you.

HUGS!

Catty1

[ramanth]

My step grandpa died because of the bottle. The damage to his liver was so intense that there was no helping him. I barely drink because I don't ever want to die that way.

I commend you for taking the steps to help yourself. *HUGS* You can do this!

[RedHedd]

The aim is to stop drinking completely on week days and only have a glass or two of wine or a beer at weekends like I used to and not to drink every day like I do at the moment.

Have also bought a silly table top football game to play at work so on days when I have nothing to do at lunchtime I can challenge my colleagues to a game instead of going to the pub!

Hmm. ...good luck with that. It is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker to be able to control and enjoy their drinking.

As for going into bars while newly trying to stop drinking, it's been said that if you hang out in barber shops, you will eventually get a haircut. .... I think you can figure the rest out.

As others have said, do try to go to a few AA meetings to see how you identify. Keep talking! You've made a terrific start.

[Karen]

Good morning my dear, dear friends.

For the first time in a very long time I fell asleep naturally last night and woke up without that "morning after" feeling. Your posts and pms have given me so much strength - I was able to confess all to my husband who was shocked at the extent of my problem but is now being fantastic.

The bond between PTers gave me the courage to face up to my problem and find the determination to take control. Thank you all for your love and support

Keep remembering that we're here for you, even tomorrow and the next day and the next ... Glad you told hubby and that he's also on your side, and that you were able to have a soft drink at lunch. Both great steps!

[carole]

Please Please get yourself asessed professionally, you really need to know are you just a problem drinker or an alcoholic, if the later you cannot just drink in the weekends, you have to stop for good, one drink and you will be back to exactly how much you were drinking before.

My ex was told to change his whole lifestyle really, it meant not associating with his drinking mates and going to pubs , at least in the early stages of gaining sobriety, it is only temptation.

I am thrilled you opened up to your husband and he has been so supportive, he is going to be your backbone from now on.

Remember this effects your whole family,they just might need some other support themselves to help you through it all,for me my experience has scarred me for life,but that does not need to be the case for you and hubby.

Many people think an alcoholic needs to be drinking a lot of booze, my ex only had two bottles of beer a week, hardly what you would describe as being a alcoholic, but he had to have that no matter what, even if we were broke, it came first, also because he was not getting enough for his habit, he was very bad tempered and hard to live with.

I don't want to put a downer on your progress, but it sounds like you might be in a bit of denial,i only come to that conclusion by your decision to drink weekends only, however as i pointed out you need to be assessed to see exactly what is what, good luck to you.

[Pawsitive Thinking]

Hmmmmm.........some good points made here. Won't get into the mindset of "just the one won't hurt" because it will.

Went the whole of yesterday without having an alcoholic drink of any description! The biggest challenge was the evening when we normally have beer or vodka while watching telly. I treated myself to a big thick magazine to read and although I thought about a drink occasionally I didn't have anything! In fact after a while I was hoping my hubby would suggest one so I could say "not for me thanks"......

Apart from determination to get myself under control another incentive was to be able to come here this morning and say "I didn't drink yesterday!!!" and do you know what? I'm not going to drink today either!!

[Oggyflute]

Well done mate. Advice can be good, but whatever you do, do it for yourself. Only you will decide how you go about this. As everyone has said, you will always have great support at Pet talk.

[Killearn Kitties]

Well done you! I was thinking about you last night and wondering how you were doing. I'm impressed.

[Pawsitive Thinking]

Thanks

I suppose its times like this when my stubborn streak comes in useful! I gave up smoking without any "help" (after a few useless attempts) and got to my target weight within a month so I know I can do this too. Being able to come here and be so open and honest has helped me so, so much

[sasvermont]

I know little to nothing about AA. I do know that we all have our problems, some of us more than others! I congratulate you for having the courage to admit openly that you think alcohol has been your problem. Please don't feel alone with your problem - ever - and know that the Pet Talk people who know much about AA will be there for you. (((((((((Brody's Mom)))))))))

I cannot believe how "tight" a group many of us/they/we are! This has just got to be one of the best web sites out there.

Karen and Paul, thanks so much for allowing these humans the place to meet, greet and convene.

(((((((((((((Karen and Paul)))))))))))))))

[JenBKR]

I am so proud of you Denise, great job so far! I know it can't be easy, and it took you a LOT of courage to come forward and admit this to us. We are always here for you ((((hugs))))

[flip195]

i just want to say your doing well.

I worked for 14 years at Styal in Cheshire.. shift work, high stress etc, and they had an officers club, so it was easy to roll out of work and fall into the club at the end of a stressful evening shift, usually ended going home by taxi worse for wear at 1-2am... i was drinking LOTS, at least 9 to 12 pints a day, more on Fridays when i would go to the officers club then onto a club in Manchester till 3-4 in the morning, they days I did'nt work I went to the pub.

Yes it helped with the stress but it was taking it's toll. My father also had a drinking problem when I was a kid so I was well aware of what I was doing.

Anyway to cut a long story short I woke up one morning with yet another hang over and said enough is enough, and it stopped right there.

Now i Have the occasional light beer and thats it (still 12 bottles of coors light in the fridge from before christmas) If I can do it anyone can... way to go.

[Karen]

Apart from determination to get myself under control another incentive was to be able to come here this morning and say "I didn't drink yesterday!!!" and do you know what? I'm not going to drink today either!!

Excellent! We are all pulling for you to stack one day on top of another and another and ...

[Catty1]

Good for you, one day at a time.

Perhaps you don't have the illness.

I am glad I do - because as many times, or as few, in a week as I want to, I can meet up with others who are learning to live sober(which is different that not drinking). It's an incredible bond.

After all - only the first step of the twelve mentions alcohol.

The disease starts in the mind. IF you are alcoholic, one day your resolve and good will will evaporate and you will drink again. This is the "blank spot" that is characteristic of alcoholic thinking. We put our hand back on the hot stove.

I hope this gets easier and easier for you. If you wind up grouchy and 'white-knuckling' in a week or less or more - just get to a meeting and see what you think for yourself.

hugs
Catty1

[carole]

I am so extremely proud of you and your efforts,fantastic, just beware of the withdrawal effects, to be honest i think if you are an alcoholic you will suffer the DDTS i think that is the right term for it, not a pleasant experience, you may experience like things crawling over you that kinda of stuff,(My husband chose to be in a special facility to dry out, he was monitored daily, and he did experience this) you may also need this type of help in the future, well worth thinking about,i certainly am no expert on it all, but i can only share with you my own experience with my former husband, i do have some knowledge which i hope will be of help to you, anytime you want to PM me please do , i am only too willingly to offer you any support and advice i can.

Great stuff, and I wish you well today, remember it is not easy to do it alone, get the help you need and don't be too hard on yourself, take care and all the best, YOU CAN DO IT. you know you can.