Working for family (long but very important to me) UPDATED

[Corinna]

I find it hard to be;eive you can't find a young person hungery for a job and a career may be with the possiblity of owning the shop in a couple years.

[JenBKR]

(((hugs))) oh Sue, I am so sorry. What a difficult situation you are in, and I know you must feel that no matter what you decide it will be the wrong decision. I don't know that I have any advice, just to have faith in yourself and stay strong. Pretty crappy that your brother would do that, IMO. Let me know if there is anything I can do. You can PM me anytime.

[Cataholic]

Sue,
If I were you, I would focus on the things I CAN control, and let go of the ones that I cannot. That is easier said than done, I know. However, once you do let go of the things out of your control, you will stop alot of the roller coaster of emotions. Think that through- you cannot control your brother's quittting, opening a new shop, your father's actions of either not staying with the business, etc.

Next, I would remember that you are ONLY responsible for your own actions. Not you brother's, not your father's. Just yours. As long as you do things that put you and your family first, what other people 'feel' is their business, their responsibility.

Then, I would make sure that you are as marketable, and that you have a resume 'up to date', and an idea of what is going on in the marketplace.

Last, here is some reality- family business, or not, you are in the same position most of us are (while we might not 'fess up to it)- replacable as an employee, at the employer's beck and call, and with the risk of having the company fold at a moment's notice. You have some benefits that I bet many of us do not- dogs/pets at work, a month's severance, and the ability to know what is going on with the place. Not meant to diminish your feelings...but, instead, make you realize you are not alone in your position.

Good luck.

[lv4dogs]

updated this in the first post

[JenBKR]

(((HUGS))) I am so sorry this is happening again. Life's rough patches never seem fair, but have faith that everything will work out in the end. Being miserable at work is hardly worth it, but if it's between that and your critters...whew, not an easy decision. I wish I had some wonderful, inspirational advice to give (like you always give me ) but I really don't except to say that anytime you need to talk PM me. If there is anything I can do please let me know! I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

[beeniesmom]

I just saw this post now. I am so sorry for what you are going through.
I hope you and your father can find a solution to the existing issues.
I know it can be difficult working with relatives, especially parents. I had to work with my dad for 7 years and it was not easy. The only difference, believe it or not, is that at the time, he worked for me. He slacked on his job and expected me to cover for him with the big boss. This made me very unconfortable and upset. I was happy the day he retired and I didn't have to put up with that crap any more. I have since moved away, as you know, and am in a new job.
I truly don't know what to tell you since it's a family business.
I just hope you can resolve some of the problems with your meeting with him.

Don't worry to much about it either way....
I live by the philosophy that when a door closes a BIGGER and BETTER one opens. You and your critters will be fine.
PM me if you need.

[k9krazee]

Giant ((((((Hugs)))))) to you...I don't know what to say...except I hope it all works out in the end, hang in there!

[Husky_mom]

oh........i´m sorry how thing are turning, but i know i speak for a lot of us if not everybody when i say that we are here for you, for whatever you need, i know i´m not as close to you as i would like to be able to help more, but theres plenty PTers willing to give you a hand, if i can help from here just let me know i got your back..........

just dont let yourself down, keep positive, and as said before when a door closes it is because something better is on its way, and everything happens for a reason.......... to get better.

i´m sure we will miss you but we understand what you are going through so take your time, because we will be waiting with arms open.... good luck Sue

HUGS AND KISSES to you and the pooches

[catland]

Sorry I didn't see this sooner. I think that you and your father should first consult a lawyer to understand any possible legal ramifications - and then if its possible the two of you should either buy out or fire your brother.

Also, check out the internet or the bookstore for books/articles that deal with the psychology of family businesses.

Google something like "family business stress" and you'll be on your way. You'll either be directed to books to buy or you might be able to find online reprints of articles that deal with exactly what you and your father are going through right now.

Finally, I agree with Cataholic - prepare for the idea that you won't work there anymore by having your resume ready. In fact, there's nothing to stop you from starting the process now. Employers tend to want to hire people away from other people, so the best time to look for a job is when you have a job. This will at least remove some of the anxiety of what will happen in the future.

[poofy]

I feel so bad for you..I pray that all will be well for you and your pets..