I hate my MIL!!!!

[carole]

I hope that you can resolve this to your pleasing Jamiee, I completely understand not wanting to be the center of attention, and over the years I have done things I hated to please others, not any more, I say please yourself and do what makes you happy, it is your life and you are entitled to have what you want.

Maybe your MIL interferred too much by the sounds of it, and although I agree Josh should stand by you , it is always hard for a son to be against his mother, he might feel torn between the two of you.

I cannot judge your MIL because I do not know her, but i know that she is going to be in your life for a very long time and really you might just have to stand your ground and it might mean that these type of issues will not happen again in the future, just my thoughts anyhow..but try not to feel Hatred towards her, she might have had good intentions really but just went around it the wrong way.

Life is full of these type of hiccups, someone somewhere always gets their feelings hurt or intentions mis-construed,but a big falling out over this could mean years of hurt and stress, so my advice would be to try and work something out, to suit everyone but mostly yourself without a great big argument if humanely possible.

I hope to be a MIL oneday, and I think this thread is giving MIL a bad name,from all the comments regarding MIL, there are some out there who are ok ya know.

[Samantha Puppy]

Hate is a strong word. I don't hate the woman, I was just extremely upset and emotional yesterday. She and I actually get along great about 98% of the time. She spent the last 25+ years being the only woman in the household (she and FIL had 3 boys) so she's used to getting her way. She's also spent 35+ years around the bossy matriarch of the family so that rubbed off on her too, I'm sure. At any rate, though we have our disagreements I know I'm lucky to have someone like her as a MIL as opposed to, say, what my brother just got as one.

I have given in to her plenty over the last 10 years... sometimes because I was still "just" Josh's girlfriend and didn't feel it was my place to stand up to her and other times to keep the peace. I cut down my side of the guest list for my wedding so that she could invite more people -- and they didn't pay for the reception. Josh and I did. I just felt that if I didn't take a stand in this case, she'd expect me to roll over and get her way with everything and that's just not the way things are going to be. All that in addition to the fact that I hate, loathe and despise having the attention focused on me so the thought of spending the day with the wives of my friends and the women in the family alone, instead of everyone who means something to Josh and I, was just excruciating.

Anyway... I'll see what tomorrow brings. I did hear back from Erika who basically confirmed what I thought. MIL did not explain the party clearly so my guy friends were under the assumption that it would be your average baby shower type party. I don't think it was malicious in intent but the fact still remains that she didn't explain things clearly to Erika so that Erika could spread the word accurately. So I guess there will be one final update tomorrow or Friday, once my mom, MIL and I have spoken tomorrow night. As of right now though, everything is still off.

[Pawsitive Thinking]

Have you considered hibernating and taking care of yourself, your hubby and baby and letting the rest of them get on with it? You 3 are the most important.......YOU are the family unit, it isn't a "peepshow" for anyone else, however well meaning they are. Do not go tying yourself in knots over things that really don't matter - your health and that of your baby comes first xx

We don't really have baby showers in the UK so escape all the stress - frankly mums-to-be have enough to cope with