No... I don't blame my mother. But before my sister and then me, there was NO history of neural tube defects on either side of my family... so I don't know where mine and my sister's defects came from. So I don't blame anyone. But if this baby has one, it's definitely from my genes. I know I don't have control over it (another problem I have, being a planning/control freak) but I'd still feel responsible for it.

And no, if the baby has a problem, I won't love it less. I just hope it doesn't have an additional issue in life to have to deal with - there's enough going on.