Carole, don not worry about your reply! It was not about you per se, but how you relate the the cirumstances. I appreciate that.

Sometimes I feel hubby can not say no because of guilt he still feels for all those years he was away overseas in the Navy before the divorce, and then being away working 60 hours a week to make ends meet as a single dad. He denies feeling guilty of course, but I still think guilt is there.

And YES, he always plays "good cop" and I get to be "bad cop". I never wanted to be bad cop, but thats the role I am forced to play when I see her getting away with everything. Even my youngest (15) says "dad, you gotta put your foot down!" Pretty bad when the younger sister plainly tells dad he's too soft!