Firstly, I am so sorry to hear your sad news. You must give yourself time to grieve - the loss of a beloved pet is no different to losing a human friend or relative. I can only say from experience of losing both quite recently that the old addage of time being a great healer is true. I had to have my beloved tortie put to sleep last year and lost my darling Dad in March so understand a little of how you feel. It helps no end to be able to talk - and if there is no one in person for you there will always be someone on line to listen - take care x x