I will admit that this thread is not cat related. And I will further admit that I only wanted to post it here, and not general, as this is where I am the most comfortable.

I am terribly depressed. I have been crying myself SICK! And all over a person who I concidered a great friend and one who obviously has not returned the feeling.

The hurt is real and it is devastating. My mind will not allow me to move past it. I dwell and I dwell, wondering what could be so wrong with me to make someone, who for over a year and a half has, told me they loved me (as a dear friend) all of a sudden not even want me to send an email.

This hurts is equal to the loss of my friend to an untimely death 2 years ago. How can I lose 2 close friends in such short amount of a time and still continue to function?

Just so you know where I stand, I have begun working with a psychiatrist to find a medicine to help my uncontrolled depression (which I have had most of my life) and will begin to talk to a councellor (even though I can not forsee it helping).

I do not feel very good about myself right now. I have always hated myself and when people do things like this to me it just serves to prove how unworthy I am and how unloved.

I am sorry to burden you all with a depressing thread, but I need shoulders......LOTS of shoulders to cry on.