~steps onto soapbox~

I dont think your over reacting. I would be doing the same thing. Does she have a scratching post for the kitten? I think if she was really your friend, she would listen to what you had to say instead of just saying "dont lecture me on this". Declawing is EXTREMLY painful for the cats, does she know this, or does she think it doesnt hurt? If she really cared about the cat, she would think twice before doing this...

~steps off of soapbox~