Dear Patch,

Oh the indignity! Am I the only feline who understands the horror and humiliation to which you have been subjected???? If my humans even THOUGHT to put water on me....

I suggest you do what I do when offended.

One "present" - just one. Make sure you put it in a place that makes it difficult to see. I prefer under a table - on a patterned rug or - if I am truly inspired - on a patterned rug under a table.

It is very fun to watch them try and figure out how long it has been there...

Do take the treats though. You must keep up your strength...

Edwina/es