I'm sorry you're so depressed this Christmas Eve. I wouldn't think that'd be much fun to be alone. You sound like a really nice lady and I hope you find something to do or think about that will get your mind off of the sad stuff going on in your life right now. I hope by this time next year things are better for you ;] And atleast you have your animals to keep you company, right? ;] Take Care & Merry Christmas!