to heal when we lose someone we love so much. I sympathize so much with you...My family and I said goodbye to one of our beloved cats, Billy, in June, and I'm still in tears from time to time. Your story about how you said goodbye to your babygirl had me in tears because it is so much like how we said goodbye to our Billy. He was 17, and had chronic renal failure, and the end was a blessing because, like you said, he went on to a happier place with no more suffering. We all loved him so much, but Billy and I had such a bond...I've had cats all my life, but he was so very special to me. I've never had another cat like him, and I know I probably won't again. Billy was a once in a lifetime animal, and I know that I will miss him for the rest of my life.

One reason you may be having such a hard time right now is because it is the holidays. I know. This is the first Christmas in 17 years that we have not had Billy with us, so I understand that it can be a particularly tough time. I wish that I had something magic to say to help you feel a bit better, but I really don't except this...When I find myself having a bad moment from missing Billy, instead of letting myself get so upset, I remind myself of everything that was so wonderful about him, and where he is now, and how healthy and happy he must be as he watches over us all. This does often help, and maybe it will help you, too.

Take care, and hang in there.