scared that my illness might have some consequences for me at work.
Your illness will have consequences on your life. You cannot do your work at all if you die. Sorry to be blunt, but get your priorities straight.

I do not know if Germany has any kind of medical disability income, but your doctor can help you with that.

AND - each one of us is dispensable. To go back to the grim part - what if you did die (God forbid!)? The company would go on. They would find someone - they would have to.

I don't know if the company CAN'T find staff, but a letter from your doctor ought to light a fire under the management!

They cannot continue to work their staff the way they are. Your going on medical leave, if you can, might be a sign to them that things need to change.

SWEETIE - you have suffered long enough, schatzi! Don't "should" on yourself. Let the work world turn without you for a while. Burnout by itself takes a long time to get over...I know. And if you are one step beyond...you have to stop what you are doing now.

{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}