Quote Originally Posted by Desert Arabian
So basically I am nothing but a useless sack of potatoes and should leave him and walk away from him, since I am of absolutely no help at all? That does not make sense to me at all. Why can't I help him, what is stopping me? I cannot give him encouragement when he summons for it, or offer a shoulder for him to lean on when he needs to take a break from things and try to come to terms with this situation?! I know I am not God, but what is stopping me from lending a helping hand? I do not want to change him- because I like him just the way he is, he just needs to adapt to this new situation and over come his feelings, which is obtainable with some help.

I am not the type of person who can do this- just ignore the issue and hope that someone else does the dirty work- I challenge issues head on and react appropriately to the issue and see that what needs to get done gets done. He is a part of my life, he is a wonderful friend, I am going to help him when he calls upon me to do so, I am going to support him and help him over come this obstacle. My focus is on school also, but it will not be the ONLY thing I am focusing on- the people in my life mean more to me, that is just who I am- people come first. I do not give up without a fight, I support and fight until the end.
You are far from a sack of potatoes. That wasn't what I meant. It is fine to be supportive, understanding, patient, etc. But, to really 'help' this young man takes more than that. IF his issues are as you suggested in your original post, and I took them as fact, this isn't some minor thing. Change someone? I go to the bank with that one..you cannot change someone. Only that person can change him/herself.

As for sibling rivalry being 'normal' at 16, 17...I disagree. While it might be something that is out there in the world, keep in mind that doesn't mean it is normal. Abuse is out there, too, in all age groups, that doesn't mean it is 'normal'.

And the communication issue? Kblaix somewhat 'proved' my statement. Today, years later, I presume (I don't know how old you are, Kblaix!) you still struggle with communication issues/intimacy issues (hugging, etc). So, my original statement rings true. People without communication skills as a young person do not grow up to be communicable people. Of course, all generalities have exceptions. It wouldn't be one I would count on for MY life partner.