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Thread: I need help....

  1. #76
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
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    Arizona
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    2,586
    Quote Originally Posted by lizbud
    Catty1, this statement is a bit" over the top", don't you think? Young
    women leaving the family home to strike out on their own is not a police
    matter. Doesn't matter if it's a good idea or not.
    It could become a police matter if they believe she would ever harm Cam in any fashion. Cam is a defenseless child and MUST come before all others, whether his "mother" is a legal adult trying to strike out on her own or not.

    I am sending all my prayers that she returns Cam unharmed, and soon! Big hugs are being sent your way also.

    Crystal

    I will miss you forever, my sweet Scooter Bug. You were my best friend. 9/21/1995 - 1/23/2010
    Goodbye, Oreo. Gone too soon. 4/2003 - 9/12/2011.
    Farewell & Godspeed, sweet Jadie Francine. You took a piece of my heart with you. 11/2002 - 8/8/2016
    Charlie kitty, aka: Mr. Meowy. Our home is far too silent now. 2003-6/14/2018

  2. #77
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Tennessee, USA
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    17,326
    Quote Originally Posted by joycenalex
    dear kim, hugs for you, and prayers for cams' protection. does she have legal custody of cam? due to her legal problems, i seem to recall the other grandmother had legal custody: if so has an amber alert been filed? i am so sorry she has done this to him. joyce

    You are getting Catnapper Kim's story confused with mine. Catnapper's step-daughter has never lost custody of Cam. They've just lived with Kim and Grant since he was born. My daughter is the one who has lost custody of my grandbaby who is temporarily living with her other grandmother. Too bad there are so many of these heartbreaking cases just right here on PT.

    In addition, so far she has not done anything "illegal" for the police to be looking for her. The first question out of their mouths will be "does she have legal custody ... is she the child's mother? Both of which the answer is "yes". They will then ask if Kim / Grant have a reason to believe that the child is in harm to which they can tell what they know. After that, the cops will most likely get Child Protective Services to contact Kim and Grant and take a report. I don't know that they or the police would still take the initiative to actually try to locate them though unless there were clear signs of physical abuse and a filed police report of such.

    I'm not trying to shatter your hopes of this being "the answer," Kim, just sharing what I have learned. The legal guardians / parents always have the rights in a situation like this. It is very hard to do much of anything.

    I pray that you have better luck with this than we did. As you said, your daughter most probably won't really want to take care of Cam for long and will return him to you. My daughter ended up doing something negligent by leaving Jenna home alone while she was napping. Eventually your daughter will mess up too, I just pray it is not in a way that is harmful to little Cam.
    Kim Loves Cats and Doggies Too!

  3. #78
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Alberta, Canada
    Posts
    22,005
    Originally Posted by lizbud
    Catty1, this statement is a bit" over the top", don't you think? Young
    women leaving the family home to strike out on their own is not a police
    matter. Doesn't matter if it's a good idea or not.
    That's up to the police, IMO.

    Young women often have their families involved with a legitimate 'move out on their own.' They know they can support themselves, and have things in place.

    This young women does not seem to have a history of thinking ahead. What if she has another collapse from her lifestyle and is back in hospital?

    I suspect Cam will be returned to the grandparents, as it will get too much for her (catnapper has said as much). She never contributed any of her earnings to Cam's wellbeing. None.

    I do not think 'striking out on her own' will suddenly change all that.

    JMO
    "Do or do not. There is no try." -- Yoda

  4. #79
    Join Date
    Jan 2001
    Location
    columbus, ohio, usa
    Posts
    3,110
    wow, i'm sorry i got got kimlovescats' and catnappers' hard times mixed up. , i'm going back to edit my post from yesterday.
    joyce who has princess peanut, spokesdog for the catpack, mojo, magic, kira and squirty, members of the catpack, angel duke, a good dog who is missed and angel alex the wonder dog, handsome prince.

  5. #80
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    indianapolis,indiana usa
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    22,881
    Quote Originally Posted by kimlovescats

    In addition, so far she has not done anything "illegal" for the police to be looking for her. The first question out of their mouths will be "does she have legal custody ... is she the child's mother? Both of which the answer is "yes". They will then ask if Kim / Grant have a reason to believe that the child is in harm to which they can tell what they know. After that, the cops will most likely get Child Protective Services to contact Kim and Grant and take a report. I don't know that they or the police would still take the initiative to actually try to locate them though unless there were clear signs of physical abuse and a filed police report of such.

    . The legal guardians / parents always have the rights in a situation like this. It is very hard to do much of anything.

    I agree. You've said it better than I.
    I've Been Boo'd

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  6. #81
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Tabbyville, PA
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    15,827
    I haven't been able to respond lately but I have been reading the responses.

    You have no idea how different this house feels. Its completely night and day. No stress. No tension. Its simply WONDERFUL. The crappy thing is we're missing Cameron in the worst way. And there's nothing we can legally do about it. All we can do is report her to child services and cross our fingers that she won't put a snow job on them. Ashley is a fantastic liar and manipulator. Her newest boyfriend has been spending every night on our sofa for the past two weeks because, as she claimed to hubby, "he has been fighting with his mom" Quite a few times over the past two weeks, she picked him up from a bar drunk. We have the feeling he's been camping out on our sofa not because of fighting with his mom, but because she told him she's being abused here. Nobody EVER laid a hand on her. SHE of course HAS hit US. Any bodily injury she might have received was in defense or to stop her from going off the deep end.

    She left the house with 95% of her stuff.... and hardly anything for Cam. No bottles, no pacifier, barely any clothes. Not his favorite blankie, and no toys (with one or two exceptions). And most of all: no crib. WHERE is this boy sleeping? It all makes me think she had plans on sending him elsewhere while she begins a new life for herself. I feel she might have given him to his father. At least he's safer there. I don't trust the father but I do trust his grandmother, who lives there.

    She took Cam simply to spite us. She doesn't want him. The more she tried to proove she can care for him herself the past few weeks, the more she confirmed she CAN'T. She is too interested in text messaging people that she ignores him... one night he was wandering around with a meat carving knife and she had no idea. She left him alone in the shower, with the shower running and a few inches of water. She leaves him wandering around the downstairs while she does laundry, gets dressed, goes to the bathroom, etc. She says "its only for a minute!" but she has no idea what trouble a toddler can get into unwatched for a mere 15 seconds. Total neglect in my eyes. We have been doing our best to keep him safe by being here to watch her watching him. Now she's gone and we can't do that --- he's no longer safe at all.

    We still haven't heard anything from her. We still have no idea where she went. We'll just tell Child Services they can find her at work. We'll tell anyone looking for her to find her at work. They won't be too keen on that after a while since she doesn't have a direct line.

    We will tell Child Services everything. I have photos of her that aren't too good for her (Hubby face when she hit him, her dancing on a nightclub bar, an email she sent random guys of her posing nude for them, and so on) They will get my journal, the photos and emails. They will have to do a psych evaluation of her.... hopefully she doesn't lie her way through it. She's been lying so long that she herself has no idea what the truth is any longer.

    Please keep poor Cam in your prayers. Hubby and I don't need it but Cam sure does. We want him back, but his mom can stay far away. Hubby doesn't want her back at all. All this while, he's been tolerating her behavior because he knew as long as she stayed here, Cam was safe. He only had concern for Cam, but he was missing the big picture that t he stress and environment wasn't good for Cam either. Sigh.

  7. #82
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Pennsylvania
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    18,854
    Kim, Can you talk with Cam's real father and his mom and family and alert them to be on the lookout for Cam. You should be working TOGETHER! Let them know Cam is welcome back with You and Grant and that you are worried. You may not like Cam's dad, but at this point HE has to be better than "mom" is.
    .

  8. #83
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Bexhill, UK
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    8,815
    That poor little boy........
    Give £1 for a poundie www.songfordogs.co.uk

  9. #84
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Tennessee, USA
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    17,326
    Kim, I swear we are living a double life sometimes! She is so much like my daughter it is scary! It is so typical for my daughter to buy for herself and not her own baby. She used to buy junk McDonald's and give Jenna a bit here or there and forget to feed Jenna. This was while they were LIVING HERE! I would ask her, "when has Jenna eatin'? Has she had her lunch?" Amy Beth would respond, "oh, no she hasn't eatin' since breakfast, I guess she COULD be hungry!" This was after I scolded her for fussing at Jenna's crying from hunger!!!!

    It was the hardest thing ever to set her and Jenna up in an apartment, and now I see that it was a blessing in disguise when my daughter left her home alone. Jenna slept through the whole absence and it was enough to get the police and DCS over there and Jenna taken away from her! Jenna is growing, thriving, happy and healthy with her other grandmother! The only thing I hate about that situation is that her LOSER "father" is living at home with "mommy" too! I know things could be MUCH worse for our Jenna though, so I am grateful for this.

    I'm thinking that the other grandmother and "father" might be the answer your Cam needs right now as well. If other grandma is up to and willing to step in, then TAKE it! You have done a wonderful thing for Cam and you guys deserve a break. I know that Jerry and I sure are enjoying ours, and it took a while to quit missing our Jenna. Now we rest assured knowing each night that she is safe in her own bed with her Granny D and we can get her over for visits anytime we ask!

    HUGS, Kim
    Kim Loves Cats and Doggies Too!

  10. #85
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Santa Paula, CA
    Posts
    27,648
    Yes I agree with Jen in that Cam's real fathers family should be alerted about this. Maybe they know where Ashley and Cam are. I sure hope that you'll be able to find where Cam is soon and that he's safe. Lots more prayers and positive thoughts are going out to you.

  11. #86
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    North East Ohio
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    11,760
    Sending {{{HUGS}}} and prayers to you, hoping that your daughter sees the light and does what's right for herself (get help) and Cam (get him to a home that is safe for him)
    ~Angie, Sierra & Buddy
    **Don't breed or buy while shelter dogs die!**

    I suffer from multiple Shepherd syndrome



  12. #87
    Oh my good lord, I'm just catching up with this now. Has there been any news about Ashley and Cam??

  13. #88
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Location
    California
    Posts
    13,005
    Just checking for an update. Keeping your family in my prayers.

    Hugs, Kelly
    ...RIP, our sweet Gini...

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