For teens and moms of teens... (womanly issues)

**jackie** · 10-03-2005, 05:23 PM

i would put her on the pill. Its being used as a medicament here, not you like and your husband are saying "go on honey, go have sex now". I had a couple of friends very similar to your daughter, and going on the B.C. pill turned their life around for them. Now they can function normally during their period.

**jazzcat** · 10-03-2005, 05:39 PM

I've had horrible, knock me out cramps since I was 11 years old and now I'm about to turn 38. That is 27 years of pain! Anyway, right before I got married I started the pill and thought for sure it was the answer to all my problems - wrong! It did nothing to help the pain or severity of my period. All it did was give me an idea of when it was coming and even that benefit slowly went away. I tried many different pills and they all made my PMS worse, caused daily headaches and did nothing to ease my period. I finally stopped taking them about 4 years ago and although my pain is still very bad at least I don't have the PMS and headaches.

Anaprox or Naproxen has been the only thing to give me some relief but I have to take heavy doses for a day or two.

I just had to comment that the pill isn't always the answer to the problem.

**lizbud** · 10-03-2005, 05:51 PM

Originally Posted by catnapper

He's finally let me take her to the doctor to see what can be done. But really, what CAN be done for her? The only thing I've ever heard of doctors being able to do was prescribe "the pill". Hubby absolutely flat-out says NO WAY to that one. As a mom, I kinda agree that giving a 15 year old the pill is not every parent's dream because the feeling is she'll think she's now invicible and has a license to have lots of sex. I don't know... this daughter is too level headed to do that..... but still, she has had the same boyfriend for a year now

Anyway, is there anything else they can do for her with today's medicine and medical technology, or is the old tried and true the only way? Would it be so bad to put her on the pill if it means no more pain?

It would be a cold day in hell before I ever felt I needed to get permission
from anyone to take my child to a Doctor for treatment. But, anyhow, why
not just take her to a Ob/Gyn and have her checked out.Let the Dr. make any
suggestions on how this could be helped. Good Luck to her.

**catnapper** · 10-03-2005, 06:06 PM

Originally Posted by lizbud

It would be a cold day in hell before I ever felt I needed to get permission
from anyone to take my child to a Doctor for treatment. But, anyhow, why
not just take her to a Ob/Gyn and have her checked out.Let the Dr. make any
suggestions on how this could be helped. Good Luck to her.

I am not their real mother. I am the step-mom. I can only do so much. If I was her real mom, things would be a bit different. Since I am not, things are as they are.

We are going to the Ob/Gyn. She's nervous, as would be expected. I'd have been mortified at 15 with the concept of seeing a gynecologist.

I plan on following the doctor's recommendation, but I needed to know BEFORE HAND what options are out there to formulate a reason for it that hubby can't refute. Already, the ladies that have responded have given me plenty of reasons why going on the pill wont equal sex. Thats my main concern --- how to get her on it and him agree to it if thats what the doctor prescribes. But if there IS an option out there, I'd like to know about it. To discuss it with the doctor and see which option is most likely to work, which is best for HER.

**DJFyrewolf36** · 10-03-2005, 06:21 PM

I've been on the pill since I was 12. I had major major pains and was very irregular and so mom had me into the doctor right away. (Immagine going to the gyno at 12

). I've tried several brands, and only a couple work for me. I reciently was on Seasonale and boy was that a flop! I've also tried Midol and other OTC's. Unfortuneatly, they all somehow seem to make me drowsy.

Some pills make things worse, some better. I'm glad that she is going to the OB/GYN, just to rule out anything serious as severe cramping can be caused by many factors.

Your step daughter sounds like she is a smart young woman, so I'd tell your hubby not to worry too much! (As if they listen lol)

**dukedogsmom** · 10-03-2005, 07:58 PM

I had to get on Anaprox a few years ago because of my problems. I would try the pill first, as the Anaprox makes you very drowsy and that would be hard to use while trying to stay awake at school. I know it made staying awake at work difficult. In fact, I could only take half a pill while there and then that didn't get rid of the pain. I hope you find a good solution. I'm fortunate that I didn't have pains like that until my much later years.

**NoahsMommy** · 10-03-2005, 09:49 PM

Kim,

I only wish my mom would have realized how bad my cramps were when I was younger. I had to "deal" with them from 7th grade to 12th without anything to help them. Nothing works for me...except the pill. I love that thing! I also use those heating pad things, those help a lot! I'm usually in pain with my crohn's, so I'm ususally on strong pain meds during my period as well...those work!!

What if hubby went to the appointment and had the doctor explain this to him? I assume someone that went to school for an added 8 years would be able to convince him. Hopefully.

I just feel for your daughter. Its not fair she has to be in pain if there is a way to stop it. The pill has many other benefits...besides the whole baby repellant thing.

Hope it works out.

OH! What about giving hubby some information from the internet? Would that help him??

Hugs, Kelly

**jesse_3** · 10-03-2005, 09:58 PM

Well, I have simular problems, I am 15, and on the pill to regulate my cycles. My cycles cause me to be in incredible pain, and I went to an OB/GYN and she has me on it so that I have my cycle every other month to minimalize my pain. If she ever wants to talk to someone who understands her pain full out, just have her email me at [email protected]

I really think that you should give the pill a try. Yes, I know, it is "birth control" but, if it will help her, why not?-It's has been a tremendous help with me..No, Ibuprofin, Tylonol, etc-none of them work, at all. They are not strong enough.

The last menstral cycle I had, they put me on perkeset for my pain..It was that immense.. That was only used as a last resort.

Steph, Jesse, and Splinter

**carole** · 10-03-2005, 10:06 PM

kim as a mother of a teenage girl, if this situation should arise I would have no hesitation about putting my daughter on the pill, but I would explore every other option first, it would be my last, I mean the Pill is not without side effects,some which are not so pleasant, like weightgain, some can cause skin outbreaks, depression, etc etc, I am sure you are well aware of them all anyhow, as for hubby well he is not a woman and will never know the pain and discomfort we as woman experience, so for me my hubby just would have very little say in the matter, but as you are the stepmother I guess it changes it a bit.

It is ridiculous of him to assume because she goes on the pill she will suddenly be having sex, and besides if she did decide to , far better to be taking precautions than end up having a baby at her young age don't you think?

I can recommend a drug called Arcoxia, I am not certain USA has it though , it is primarily for Arthritis, but used for other pain such as period pain, I can personally recommend it, however it is not without side effects either, and it could be taken off the market as was Vioxx, however taken in small amounts like 2 ot three pills per month I seriously doubt whether it would be harmful.

I wish you both luck at the specialist and hopefully they will come up with something that will be beneficial for her, she should not have to go through her life suffering like that.

**CathyBogart** · 10-03-2005, 10:22 PM

The pill is a great solution...HOWEVER...

It can cause a whole new set of problems. I was having hideous crapms and other problems, and I was put on the pill. Voila, no more cramps! I gained a few pounds, but it wasn't a big deal. About six months later though, I developed an allergic reaction to caffeine. I've been off the pill for over two years now and I still have problems drinking even a small amount of soda or anything caffeinated. I was really sick for a few months before I figured out what was going on.

On the plus side, the pill tends to CUT DOWN on sex drive significantly, which was one BIG reason my mother agreed to put me on it at 14 to regulate my period and cut down on cramping.

**PJ's Mom** · 10-03-2005, 10:32 PM

I had cramps from hell all during high school. Of course back then (early 80's) even the school nurse thought I was full of it. Mine were so bad they would make me throw up and keep me out of school for a day or two. Turns out I had ovarian cysts...something that didn't go away until I had my first child.

**K9karen** · 10-04-2005, 01:17 AM

[COLOR=Indigo]This brought back horrible memories for me. I suffered so badly, physically, mentally and emotionally that I was a wreck for more than a week a month. I was put on massive pain killers, I don't think there were anti-inflammatories at the time. Also water pills. When the doctor suggested BC pills, it was my mother who freaked, not my dad. The doc sat her down and explained that it was for medical reasons and that I should be trusted, etc. If I was going to have sex, I'd do it anyway. I started the pill, then stopped it. My periods were so bad, it led to severe endometriosis which couldn't be lasered because it spread to other internal organs. I went back on the pill and took it for over 20 years. I also took Serafem, a type of Prozac and B6. It saved my life. I was such a wreck for over a week with PMS that my only car accidents were at that timeWe were honest in our family too. I wouldn't have lied about taking the pill. But, maybe, both of you and your daughter should have a talk with the doctor. I'm just concerned also about the internal damage it may be doing. It's really not normal to be such excruciating pain. Now that the pipes are shut off (

)I still had 2 cervical cancer scares. I still blame it all on my past experiences. I hope you find a solution.

**LKPike** · 10-04-2005, 10:20 AM

I was the same way, and the pill never helped. if anything I only felt worse during that time. So I switched to depo provera, an injection every 3 months and you don't get your period - ever. I might get some cramping towards the end of the 3 months but its no where as bad as before.

if you do decide to use it make sure she takes extra vitamins and especially calcium. depo is supposed to effect the bones negatively.

**lizbud** · 10-04-2005, 10:50 AM

Catnapper,

Sorry if I sounded snippy yesterday.I did forget about you being a step
mom.

That does make some difference, but still, if the young woman is
that debilitated by her monthly cycle, she does need some help.I would try
also to make her dad take a Drs. word for whatever therapy is needed. I know
you are trying your best to help her.Good luck with the Dr.visit.

**DaisyJo's Mom** · 10-05-2005, 10:00 AM

it makes my stomach hurt just reading this because I too went through horrible pains...
i went to the doctor and they told me they did a test on how bad my cramps were and they rate it on a scale from one to five and mine was a 5++
they actually put me on birth control but told me not to take the last week and sooner or later it stopped my period...now i have found out that stopping my period wasn't the healthiest decision eventhough the doctor told me it was OK if i had a certain something in me...like a protein or a vitamin or something..
anyway
now my peroid is never on time..it is just now starting to become normal and this happened when i was like 15 i am now 21
so my advice...is the pill is good..just don't stop her period....and warn her that the pill changes you....like your wieght and attitude
and as the parent give her a little leeway on things because she isn't gonna be herself