Some Sad News about Oliver :(

[NoahsMommy]

After a lot of discussion and prayer, we've decided that Oliver needs to be an only cat. You all know we've tried everything besides drugging him, something I can't do and feel good about.

I just got off the phone with the behavioralist at the shelter and he said that because after over a month Oliver continues to get worse, he needs a new 1-cat home. He asked "Does he hiss/attack over food, toys or attention?" The answer is no, he attacks/growls/hisses over ANYTHING. None of the cats can even look at him without repercussions.

This morning as I was sitting at the door talking to Micah, Basie came to say "hi". All was interrupted by Oliver lunging at ME! Thank God for the Soft Paws and for the blanket that blocked us.

I am heartbroken, but I know in my heart we've tried everything. The changes in our other cats are unacceptable since Oliver came to live with us. Basil now hides from Oliver, Noel and Olivia stay only in high places unless we are there to defend them. Olivia will only sit in the house part of the cat tree or next to us. Sitting next to us doesn't work anymore, he chased her off the couch last night while she was laying on me.

I know that not everyone will agree with our decision. But let me make it clear how hard this was. I've been very upset for awhile about Oliver and I've tried everything that I've been recommended. The Feliway isn't working and either is the Rescue Remedy. He is the cat he is, and I wont drug him to make him who I want him to be. I wont.

The bottom line is, he is NOT happy and either are the other cats.

We are taking him to our shelter on Saturday. I'll be making some requests on his new placement and will make sure EVERYONE knows he needs to be alone in his new home.

I don't want anyone else to fail him.

[Barbara]

Kelly I am so sorry for you and Oliver. But he has a better chance now. At the moment he is unhappy and so are all your other furkids.

We keep all our paws crossed that he will soon find his furrever home. It should be easy as he's a real beauty

[Logan]

I don't think anyone will second guess this decision, Kelly. You know what is best. After all, he has been in your home, not ours. I wish only the best for Oliver and hope he can find a home where he can be "top cat" with no competition. Don't you worry, you gave him a wonderful chance at life. He'll be ok.

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

Oh Kelly, I'm so sorry things didn't work out for Oliver. But I know you are only thinking of his best interests and you're right that it's not fair to try and make him into the cat that you want. He has to be his own kitty, and if that means being a 1-kitty family, then that's what it will have to be for him. He will be so much happier, and so will the rest of your gang - and you...and David. I know you've been upset about his behavior almost right from the beginning, and you certainly don't need that stress right now either.

It sounds like you've thought long and hard about this, and you don't have to feel bad about your decision. You tried your best, and you most certainly didn't fail him. You did everything you knew how to make him happy.

Please give him one last hug for me before you take him back. I'm sure he will find a great furrever home where he will rule the roost, and there wont' be anybody to argue with him about it.

[HayleyRosie]

I am so sorry to hear about Oliver. I am sure he will find a great forever home and be forever happy. I am also sure you will feel better about your decision when Oliver moves into his new home. Please give him some hugs and scritchies from me, Hayley and Mandy.

[wolflady]

Oh Kelly, I'm so sorry to hear about Oliver, but I completely understand. You have tried everything you could with Oliver, but he just would be better as an only cat. Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, it just doesn't work out, and especially if your other cats are not acting like they used to, their quality of life isn't as good, and neither is Oliver's. You are so in tune with your animals that I know you know what's best for all of them **hugs**

This same thing happened with the older siamese cat, Sam that I had in college. She was fine in my apartment, and Aaron even brought Scooter over to see if they would get along. Sam made it clear to Scooter that she wanted nothing to do with him, but I could leave them in a room together without feeling scared for Scooter. But, as soon as we moved Sam and Scooter back to Aaron's apartment, all hell broke loose! Sam just terrorized Scooter so much that he would literally be running from her and pooping at the same time. She would just attack him for no reason at all. I think it was because my apartment was "neutral ground" and they could co-habitate ok there, but Aaron's apartment was Scooter's residence and smelled of Scooter and Sam just didn't like it. We tried everything to get it to work out, but Scooter's quality of life was just not good, and neither was Sam's. She needed to be an only pet, so we found her a good home and she's so happy now!
I know what a tough decision this is for you, so please know that I completely understand and I am here for you! I've been in the same position. It's just better for your other 5 kids as well as Oliver too.
**hugs**
Karen

[trinity]

My husband and I made that decision a while back concerning our Sam-cat. After a bunch of years with us, our new stray was making her life miserable, to the point that we had to put Sam on nerve medicine. Our others, who she had grown up with, chased her around a bit but it got worse.Fortunately a very good friend had just bought a house and she and Samantha bonded immediately. Sam is now the Queen of her new home and loving every minute of it. It was a tough decision to make but just hearing how happy she is makes me smile. Best wishes to Oliver in his new home. And **hugs** to you for going thru such a tough time....

[slick]

You have nothing to feel sad about. You tried your best and sometimes adoptions or fostering just don't work out with the other family members. This will be a win-win situation. You and your furbabies will be happier and less stressed and Oliver will find a loving home where he can be the head of the household. You are a wonderful Mommy should not be feeling any guilt at all. As T & P says give him one last hug from all of us and I do hope you will be able to track his progress.

[Denyce]

I know that this is horrible for you. But you must not feel that you have failed him. It wasn't a failure on anyone's part. It just is what it is and you are doing what is the absolute BEST for all that are involved. I am overwhelmed and impressed by the lack of selfishness on YOUR part that you are able to put aside your feelings and do what is best for the cats! I think the ability to do that is so special....there are just too many out there that are unable to put aside their own feelings and keep pets in situations that are just not healthy for them. While I know that your hearts are breaking I hope you also know how incredible you are and that Oliver will find a special home where he is the King and the only King.

Denyce

[NoahsMommy]

You guys are so kind, I'm in tears right now. Thank you so much for this support.

I've been agonizing over Oliver and the fact that I didn't make sure he was good with cats before we brought him home. I've felt so guilty about just believing the informational sign on his cage.

Thanks so much for making me feel better about this decision.

[catland]

I really respect your decision. I can't imagine how hard it would be to bond with the little guy, only to realize that he is really better somewhere else.

A few months back, my husband's aunt got a new kitty to be a friend for her cat, and her poor cat just went into hysterics. She found a new home for the new cat and has accepted the fact that her cat needs to be an only cat. Some just do.

I hope that with your guidance, that Oliver finds a new home where he will be happy and that you find more peace and tranquility for the rest of your fur-babies.

[2kitties]

You have nothing to feel badly about. You clearly did everything possible. This decision is as much Oliver's as yours. Maybe he just wanted to tell you that he appreciates the offer, but sadly must decline.
I'm sure you'll see that he gets a home, one where he can rule the roost. In the current situation, he's unhappy and so are your other kitties. That's no life for anybody.

[kimlovescats]

Everyone has already said the most important things, but please know that I too respect and support your decision. Unfortunately, we just don't always know how a cat will react until we give it a chance, and you have more than done that! Perhaps that is why Oliver was at the shelter to begin with? Well, THIS time you will make sure that it doesn't happen again to Oliver, and that he will only go to a home that he can rule all by himself!!!

You are a wonderful cat-mom, so don't forget that!!!

[K & L]

I'm sorry to hear things didn't work out. We almost gave up our Gabby, she just wouldn't adjust and the others wouldn't accept her. We were searching for a home and all of a sudden everything worked out. I don't know why, guess it just took her longer than the others. I think she may have come from a one cat household. We found her on our roof in the middle of the night terrified. We think she was dumped. She's our Tortie.

[Vermontcat]

Noah's Mommy, I know it is hard but I think you are doing what is best for you and all of your cats including Oliver.
At least you will be able to visit him at the shelter until he finds a new home.
Some cats really are meant to be only cats, my cat Samantha is one of those.
We tried to add another cat to our family once but decided it was better to have one very happy spoiled cat instead of two not very happy cats!

Wolflady and Trinity, you both described my cat Samantha perfectly!
Must be something about the name that makes them want to be the Queen of the castle!