Anti-smacking law in NZ...

**carole** · 03-13-2007, 10:06 PM

Well it looks like the anti-smacking bill will pass through parliament very soon, and will be law in NZ within a month, it will be illegal to smack your child,I don't really know all the in's and outs of the law as such, as i really don't see it effecting me a great deal,but all the same , just wondered what you all thought about this, a lot of NZer's are very against this,for obvious reasons,I am in two minds myself, i mean if it really does prevent someone from going on to abuse their child I am all for it, but seriously i cannot see that happening, keep in mind NZ has a very high rate of child abuse, which is not good, so i guess this is a step in the right direction.

your views would be appreciated.

**columbine** · 03-13-2007, 10:34 PM

Well, I never thought that teaching a child "might makes right" was a good idea. Time out, no dessert, a lecture, no bedtime story... any of that stuff, and STICKING TO IT instead of relenting when the lower lip comes out (and if the child's up to speech, having THEM repeat back why it's happening) is a much stronger connection between wrongdoing and "don't."

Love, Columbine

**Sirrahsim** · 03-14-2007, 08:34 AM

I'm assuming that "smacking" is like spanking?? I would NEVER *smack* a child by the common definition (hand across the face), but I am not against spanking in principle. In VERY rare cases when the child is old enough to understand the punishment and all else has failed, a swat across the backside with a bare hand may be called for. I know that I earned a spanking or two in my youth

I'll tell you what, that got my attention REAL fast!!

I should also add that I think using any instrument to apply the spanking is cruel and unusual. There is a big difference between a spank with an open palm and a spank with a paddle or belt. I would NEVER touch my child with a belt or paddle or anything besides an open hand as a form of punishment...

As far as the law goes, it's unfortunate that some people DO get out of control, but it does happen so the law isn't crazy. This is yet another reason that parents should have psych evals before they have kids

If EVERYONE was trustworthy, we wouldn't need laws against stealing... If ALL parents were responsible, we wouldn't even think of laws against a form of punishment for children.

**moosmom** · 03-14-2007, 08:35 AM

I never smacked my kid. Why? I don't believe that children should fear their parents like I feared mine (actually I feared my father, who thought physical violence was the way to teach a child discipline and respect).

Whenever my daughter acted out, she got time. It worked everytime and believe me, to this day, she remembers (she's now 30).

I think there's also an anti-smacking law that just got passed in California .

**Sirrahsim** · 03-14-2007, 08:42 AM

I'm so sorry that you had to go through that Donna. There are definately extremes

In my case my parents were very loving and respectful, even when I did something awful that deserved a spanking. Rather than making me afraid of them, they made sure to show me that they loved me SO much that they were willing to do what it took to get through to me in order to protect me from whatever I was doing. Does that make sense? They didn't spank me when they and I were angry at each other. They spanked me later when I was cool headed enough to understand that they were doing it because they loved me.

**caseysmom** · 03-14-2007, 08:56 AM

Donna, that didn't pass here in California as far as I know.

**Puckstop31** · 03-14-2007, 09:42 AM

Sigh.... Will we ever learn.... The more power people give government over us, the more enslaved we become. How is it the governments place to tell people how they should raise their children?

Of course, parents should never abuse their child, but I was raised by parents who belived in "spare the rod, spoil the child." I was physically disciplined when I made mistakes and I rarely made the same one twice. I never really feared my parents because of it and today I am VERY grateful to them for raising me that way. It taught me to be responsible for my own actions and if I messed up, there was a price to pay... Just like the real world.

There are no "time outs" in the real world.

Action=Consequence.... For good or bad.