Death is a horrible thing....

[GreyhoundGirl]

My friend's mother died. He is 14 and his mom was in her early 40s. She was in a head-on collision with a dump truck. It is so sad. At least she died on the spot, so I wouldn't think that there would have been much suffering. Her son is way too young to lose his mother.

Also far too sad for this poor child is that recentally ( June I think ) his grandfather died, with whom he was very close.

It's summer, so I haven't been talking to him. I thought I might call him... But I got cold feet at the last minute. I didn't know what to say.... Should I not call or say anything and pretend I didn't notice? Help !

Prayers for the family. I'll pass them on.

[cyber-sibes]

Oh yes, call him. He needs friends right now. What's happened is awful, he is certainly old enough to understand everything. If he doesn't want to talk about it, he'll let you know.
Are you pretty good friends? He might like a chance to get out of the house for a little bit just to do something "normal", it's probably pretty chaotic right now. Maybe you can just go to a park or mall or something. Sometimes just having someone around, not really even talking about things, is comforting. I will keep him & his family in my prayers.

[lizbud]

Oh yes, call him. He needs friends right now. What's happened is awful, he is certainly old enough to understand everything. If he doesn't want to talk about it, he'll let you know.
Are you pretty good friends? He might like a chance to get out of the house for a little bit just to do something "normal", it's probably pretty chaotic right now. Maybe you can just go to a park or mall or something. Sometimes just having someone around, not really even talking about things, is comforting. I will keep him & his family in my prayers.

I agree. Just spend time with him when he's ready.

[*LabLoverKEB*]

Oh, my... that's just awful, and so sunnden... I can't imagaine how he, and his family feels. My prayers go out to him, and his family.

[Chilli]

I do agree, call him. People can always use an extra shoulder to cry in situations such as this.

[Soapets]

DEFINITELY call him, and ASK him about how he's feeling, etc. If he doesn't want to talk about it right then, just let him know you're available if/when he does. My mother died when I was 17, and I really felt isolated when peers never mentioned it to me. I felt like they were trying to protect me from the pain by not acknowledging it, but in reality it made things worse. I felt better when some people began asking me questions about it, so that I could talk about it realistically. It is more painful to keep silent about that kind of thing in the long run than it is to acknowledge it and talk about it, in my opinion. Don't ever try to avoid the subject. He's probably still pretty much in shock about it, and it hasn't really sunk in yet. (You can tell him that this is very normal, if it seems to be what he is experiencing right now.) It will take a long, long time for the reality of it to sink in.

Deb

[dab_20]

I can't even imagine the pain he and his family are going through. I would call him. Even if he doesn't want to talk about it, at least he knows you are there to support him when he needs it.