I Hate This!!

[G.P.girl]

the kidz in my school are always calling each other "retarded"...
it makes me so mad that they have no respect for the people that do have a disability and cant help it. my cousin has downsyndrome and i love him to death. it makes me so mad that people stare at him and make fun of people like him! of course never in front of me cause i'd beat them up before they had a chance to say another word. the worst part is that joonah (my cousin ) is only three so he doesnt know that there is anything different about him and he cant help it....oh well i cant explain my self very well...but you get what i'm saying..no....am i the only one who thinks this is a problem? what has our world come to....

[Tonya]

Hi, G.P.girl. Don't get to frustrated! I bet half the kids don't even take down syndrome into consideration when they use that word. I think for the most part, "Retard" is a word out of habit; most people have big hearts. Kill them with kindness. Educate them. They are probably not even thinking about what they are saying.

[iceyshiver21]

Yes, now teens and kids use it as more..like..just a word...with no intention of insulting those who do have a condition.

[carole]

YEP, in NZ the kid's use this term as well , a retard is the common expression, try not to be too offended, as I am certain, they don't even give it a thought as to what they are really saying, it is just one of those silly saying's that has caught on.

Still I can understand where you are coming from, Down's Syndrome children I believe are a blessing on their own, as a teenager I had a holiday job working for the IHC and was looking after 5 children with Down's, they were the most loving children ever, and I truely felt love for them., and it was indeed a wonderful experience I will never forget.

[babolaypo65]

You're right GP. It's frustrating, and it IS a problem. I feel the same way when "gay" (and its related terms) are used as an insult. The folks who are calling eachother retarded, retard... lack imagination.And they don't realize that it affects others. Your cousin has DS, so it hurts your feelings. You school probably has kids who are developmentally disabled but who dont have a syndrome with identifiable facial characteristics (simply put some kids might be retarded, but not look any different). It would be very hard for them to hear "retard" thrown around as an insult.... If you do feel strong enough you can try to educate them....It's a tough job though. And teachers should be helping with this issue.

[G.P.girl]

can you belive my gym teacher said it??? she was like" yeah you guys know how retarded the boys are they cant write neatly..."
but i do have one teacher that gives detention when he hears someone say that ...he's my favorite teacher...

[GoldenRetrLuver]

My aunt works at a school taking care of kids with Down's Syndrome, Autism (sp), and kids that are Retarted. It's an extremly tough job, but she loves it. I went with her one day and all the kids were really nice.

I can understand where your coming from, but try not to take it seriously. When people say that, I don't think they are trying to make fun of kids who are.

[babolaypo65]

That's absolutely shameful.
Yes, he probably isn't referring to people with developmental disabilities, but he is supposed to be a ROLE MODEL, not contribute to the least common denominator

Originally posted by G.P.girl
can you belive my gym teacher said it??? she was like" yeah you guys know how retarded the boys are they cant write neatly..."
but i do have one teacher that gives detention when he hears someone say that ...he's my favorite teacher...

[Soledad]

Retarded means slow or underdeveloped and can have many uses.

[babolaypo65]

Indeed it can. It's origins as an insult in schools are likely from the cognitively delayed use. While that is now perhaps not the case...

On the plus side ARC and other agencies that work with adults and children with developmental disabilities no longer use the term "retarded" to refer to their clients. While ARC used to mean "The association of Retarded Citizens" they now officially just call themselves ARC or ARCA and do not use the term.
Hopefully then, if persons with developmental disabilities are never referred to as retarded the origins of the term as an insult will have no direct impact.

Originally posted by Soledad
Retarded means slow or underdeveloped and can have many uses.

[Dogz]

I know that a lot of people say that. Not just kids, but I do think that it was wrong for you gym teacher (key word) said that. I don't think that the people that say that are using it to make fun of the mentally challanged. I think that the retarded people are really nice actually. Way nicer than some people I know, so I never make fun of them in any way. I know that we had a retarded person in our school, and she was always so friendly, and always ready to say hi.

[RubyMutt]

I also get frustrated when people use that word. I know that most of the time it's not used to insult people with mental disabilities, but I also have a cousin with downs - a few of them actually. To say something is retarded just annoys me. What's wrong with having a mental disabilities? No one is perfect. There are so many other words, why can't you think of another to use when you don't like something?

[Twisterdog]

Actually, I'm ashamed to admit, but my son, boyfried and I all use that word occasionally, just goofing around. If one of us trips or drops something or says something stupid, the other one might say, "Way to go, retard." It's meant totally as a joke, just poking a little fun at each other. I honestly never thought about it before, and certainly never made any conscious connection to handicapped people. We just say it like we would say, "Goof" or "Wierdo" or "Silly". I guess we'll have to be more careful not to say that.

[Tonya]

Yeah, Twister. I hear ya. The word that I use is "gay". Like if something is lame, I say "That's gay." Well, two of my closest friends are a lesbian couple. I said it in front of them the other day, and for the first time thought about my choice of words. Luckily, we've been friends for so long that they don't care...but I hadn't even thought about what I was saying until then.

[Cataholic]

Originally posted by Tonya
Yeah, Twister. I hear ya. The word that I use is "gay". Like if something is lame, I say "That's gay." Well, two of my closest friends are a lesbian couple. I said it in front of them the other day, and for the first time thought about my choice of words. Luckily, we've been friends for so long that they don't care...but I hadn't even thought about what I was saying until then.

And, that is exactly how you learn, Tonya. My sister cured me of the "retard" habit by ALWAYS saying, "don't use that word that way, it isn't right".....and that taught me. It is like you and me, we used it, without ill intent, not thinking.

So, G.P. girl...I would say, "ugh, don't use that word like that"....in a light way, with something between a smile and a grimace. I imagine most people will say, "Why"? Educate them, OR, more simply, share your feelings with them. And, best of all, lead by example.