Need adoption advice

[3Catcondo]

I have wanted to try for several years now to adopt a little girl from China. I don't even know how to start going about it. Does anyone here have experience with this and have any advice to offer, please?
Thank you!

[Catty1]

Please read this article first.

http://www.newsweek.com/id/105530

After decades of nonstop growth, the international adoption mill has begun to stall. Driven by rising affluence, falling birthrates and resurgent national pride, many developing nations are much less willing to let their orphans go abroad. Not only can these nations increasingly afford to care for orphans at home, but they have been spooked by highly publicized international baby-selling scandals into tightening rules. Countries as diverse as South Korea, Russia, Kenya and Brazil now openly discourage foreign adoptions.

Charity begins at home.

[BitsyNaceyDog]

I have no idea where to begin. I do know it's a long process though. My husband's cousin and her husband are finally, after years of waiting, getting to adopt a little boy from China. They go in May to finalize the adoption and bring home their son.

I know Dusty (prechrswife) adopted one of their daughters, I believe from China. She may be able to offer you some advise.

Good Luck!

[carole]

I think it is quite a process you have to go through and expensive, but yes Dusty has a lot of experience, so she would be the one to ask, hope she sees your thread.

[joycenalex]

my two youngest nieces are adopted from china. google families with childern from china. the process of adoption is long, exacting, exasperating and will be very costly. you can PM me for some more general info. the library will have numerous books and most major universities that have chinese programs will have chinese language and culture classes, you can meet up with adoptive families there too.

[prechrswife]

Our oldest daughter is from China, and I will be glad to PM you with some helpful links. I will say that the process at the moment has slowed tremendously, with the wait for referral of a non-special needs child is now standing at 3 years from log-in of paperwork in China. If you are open to special needs adoption, the process can move along more quickly. These are babies and children with needs like cleft lip/palate, heart conditions, albinism, etc. I would caution against jumping into a special needs program just for the sake of a shorter wait time, though. Also, the rules have changed within the last couple of years, so singles are no longer allowed to adopt from China, and there are some medical history issues which prevent adoption. The minimum age for adoptive parents is 30, and there are income requirements, as well.

[prechrswife]

Charity begins at home.

Please remember that adoption is a deeply personal process for families, and that decisions to adopt internationally are not made lightly. This may sound strange coming from me, considering that we have one biological child and another on the way, but for years before adopting, my husband and I dealt with unexplained infertility. Our decision to adopt internationally was made, in part, because we could not bear the thought of starting the adoption process and facing a failed domestic adoption. This happens frequently. We personally know people who have faced this. Also, at least in the US, adopting from foster care is not always as easy as people think, as the system's goal is to reunite children with their birth families as often as they can. Adoption, for most adoptive families, is not about charity or rescuing a child--it is about building a family.

[Catty1]

I understand. However, I was aware that, as you and joycenalex said, that it had become a horribly long and difficult process, unless the child was special needs.

This happens in Canada, the article was about Canadians...and it IS a shame that adoptions at home can be so impossible.

Still, the article is a good read as it is from Feb of 2008, and outlines some of the frustrations and processes as well.

[prechrswife]

Thanks for your understanding. I just felt like I needed to comment because so many people do not understand and jump to conclusions without knowing the facts of the case. It is very easy to get defensive.

[Maya & Inka's mommy]

Thanks for your understanding. I just felt like I needed to comment because so many people do not understand and jump to conclusions without knowing the facts of the case. It is very easy to get defensive.

I agree with you 100%!! We have 2 adopted children too; not from China though.... Our son Jo is from South Korea (23) and our daughter Indra is from India (20)
It is very difficult here to get "permission" to adopt, so everyone who gets selected is truly very much motivated!!