I really need a hug right now.....

[carole]

I am devastated today, as i have to tell you all my lil Zara the feral sweetie that i had spayed has died, I found her at lunchtime on the side of the road, it appears someone has picked her up and put her there and so i can only hope she died instantly,she was hit by a car, i wondered why she had not come for morning feed.

Hubby brought her back and we have buried her next to my sootie in our back garden, I just feel sick to the stomach, i put her through all the trauma of surgery etc and now just over a week later she is gone, she was so beautiful, only just over a year old, and she was so special to me, it just feels as bad as when I lost one of my own., the tears are just pouring out as i type this, I cannot believe i wont see her again, she deserved so much better in her short life.

It just is not fair, I did not get a picture of her, so I have nothing but my memories of a sweet but scared lil kitty, I hope she knew how much I loved her, I buried her with a lil note from me Zara I loved you so much, love mummy, I know to others that would sound silly, but to everyone here you will understand my need to do that, and i have placed a beautiful red rose from my garden on her grave, at least she wont be left to rot on the side of the road.

Rest in peace my dear lil Zara and have fun at the Rainbow Bridge, I loved you will all i had to give.

[kuhio98]

Oh carole ~ I'm so sorry. Poor baby. You gave her the best chance she could ask for. But, I guess it wasn't meant to be. Sweet Zara, you will not be forgotten. carole ~ A great big hug from me. I'm so sorry.
Lisa

[carole]

Thank you Lisa, I know we did our best, but it just was not good enough, that lil girl deserved so much more, it hurts so much , its unbearable just thinking about her sweet face popping over the fence for a feed, I will never forget her, never.

[Cataholic]

Carole, I am so sorry to hear about the little girl. She went to the RB knowing she was loved and cared for. While it doesn't help the hurt right now, you did so right by her. It does matter to her that you gave all that you had.

RIP, sweet one, RIP.

[I_luv_rusty]

So sorry about Zara. She does deserve better. RIP Sweethart! You will be missed!

[carole]

Thanks Johanna that did bring me comfort, I just hope she did really know that I loved her and was trying to help her, one never really knows, at least i got to see her last night, i tryed to approach her and get her to sniff my hands, and talk with her, she came for a feed last night with the other kitties and I tryed to get her to play on the fence with a long grass blade, I have to hold on to those memories of her .

[catnapper]

Oh Carole, how devastating! I can feel your pain all the way over here! Rest knowing you did what you could to make her life as happy as you could.

I am so sorry to hear your first rescue attempt ended poorly. Please continue to help animals, and perhaps you'll be able to save the next kitty from the same fate.

[luvofallhorses]

I am so sorry, Carole! ((((((((((hugs))))))))))

[jesse_3]

(((((BIG HUGS)))))
This is terrible. At least you know that she had a full belly and had a human to love her.
God smiles upon your good deeds to Zara, and Zara will await for your comming.

I know that it is hard to find comfort with a death, but just remember that you will soo her again...
(((((MORE BUG HUGS))))))
Steph and her gang

[K9karen]

Carole, love, you did a wonderful thing for Zara. So many people wouldn't care less because she was just "feral". You were loving, and caring and I have no doubt in my mind that Zara knew it. Know in your heart she "felt" every ounce of love you had for her. You were both blessed to have found each other. There's no explanation why things happen the way they do. Pictures or not, you have lovely memories forever. My thoughts and prayers are with you during your sadness.

[carole]

,I had such high hopes of taming Zara, she was letting me get so close to her, I figured when that neighbour left she would not take her even though i had asked her to, and she would be my girl, I would have taken as best care of her that i could, now i will not have the chance, everytime i think of her and see her in my mind I just cannot stop crying, i never knew myself how much i loved that wee girl.

She was one of the prettiest cats i had ever seen, I will describe her as best I can, she was white with these lovely black splotches on her back,and she had this lovely black stripe down her nose, the rest of her was white, and the most gorgeous eyes ever, almond shaped with like heavy black liner on them, she always blinked them alot at you, just like my Lexie., you know two of Duchess's kittens are almost spitting images of her except they do not have the black stripe on their wee noses.,her own kitten was nothing like her except they all have this little cute markings on their bottom lip, seems to be in the family as each cat has it and Zara's kitten did too, quite distinctive they were.

I have not seen Zara's kitten since we took it to the shelter and it was in a foster home, I really feel the need to see her more than ever now, so I must find out the foster mother's name and address and see if I can see her.

It is so dumb I keep looking out the window expecting to see her on the fence waiting for a feed, and when i fed the other two tonight it was hard knowing lil Zara was not going to be there,poor Victoria also lost her daughter tonight, but she is so busy with her mother's kittens helping out I don't know that she really knows what has happened or where Zara is.

[moosmom]

Oh Carole!

I am at a loss for words! After all you've done for her. How sad. Please, do NOT blame yourself! This was a tragic accident and you did all you could for that precious little girl. She was very fortunate to have you in her life, no matter how short it was.

RIP my sweet Zara. Godspeed to the RB.

[carole]

Donna I just keep asking myself why did this have to happen, this little girl had lived as a feral for over a year, I feel bad that she had to go through all this trauma of surgery and being caged only to loose her life a couple of weeks if that later, it seems all so pointless, I know i was not to know this would happen, but now I wish I had never put her through it all, it was tough for her and she was so scared but oh so well behaved., I know had she lived her life would have been better not having to have kittens,it just is so darn unfair, why now of all times, why at all?????I am so heartbroken, i had formed such a bond with her, that was unique and special from any other cat, because she was a feral girl, and had begun to trust me., I still cannot believe she is gone.

[tatsxxx11]

Oh, I'm so, so sorry, Carole I know how such a loss touches a dear heart as yours. But please, don't blame yourself. Little Zara was so lucky to have had a special friend like you. She left this world knowing someone loved her I'm so sorry... HUGS to you friend. And may God bless dear, precious Zara.

Love, Sandra

[Alysser]

That's so terrible! It's not your fault at all though. I hope she didn't suffer. The sad truth is she was lucky she lasted over a year. Ferals don't make it that long. Which stinks!