Parents And Unruly Kids

[RICHARD]

What is the reasoning behind people 'bragging' about how unruly their kids are?

My 'boss' walked in to day and asked me when I went on vacation.

He stated that I was going two days after his kids were leaving with his mom on their vacation...

He smiled and said he was getting a vacation away from his 12 and 4 year old. His four year old is daddy's girl and won't behave for the mother and the 12 year old was threatened with jail for skipping school, again! He made the 'jail' statement with a little smirk on his face, kind of like 'Oh, well...."

I told him it sounded like he had his hands full - he got ticked off and started to defend his kids. "They aren't too bad..."

Why talk about them and when someone agrees, get ticked off??

[thelmalu99]

I hear ya. LOL, don't even get me started on the topic of children without discipline.

I know a few people with impossible children, and when they complain, I just sit there and smile and nod my head, putting on my best 'kids will be kids' face. If I voice my opinion, I know I will get the, "What do you know? You don't have any kids", so I just zip it.

I have learned my lesson. I once worked with a woman who sat there complaining that she couldn't get her 5 year old out of her bed and into his own. Of course, in my mind, I'm thinking, it's her own fault for letting the child get used to sleeping in the bed with her and her husband every night. Now, after 5 years, she wants to complain?

I made the mistake of voicing my opinion, nicely, but saying that she must put a stop to it, because it's not healthy for the child, nor is it healthy for her marriage to have to leave their own bedroom and go to the couch any time they want to have a little intimacy.

Why did I bother? This woman had a fit and said that she was very "proud of her child-rearing decisions". So why on earth was she complaining? If she's so proud, she should be very happy that her child will probably be in high school and still be sleeping between mom and dad.

From then on, I learned to keep my mouth shut about other people's kids.

[G.P.girl]

lol! i think it's more annoying when people won't shut up about how great their kids are...actually it'd be better if they wouldn't talk about then at all....JMO. it's ok if they mention them every once in a while, but no one wants to know what little Johmmy had for breakfast, lunch and dinner in the last 3 weeks

[catnapper]

Ugh! Another huge problem with our society! My husband was reading the paper the other day and there was an article that interviewed three of the area's best retiring teachers. They said that as little as 7 or 8 years ago, they could walk into a room, shut the door and the class would be quiet. Today, they'd have to slam the door twenty times and the class still wouldn't become quiet. The kids today are not reprimanded for misbehaving and everyone's too quick to call someone a child abuser when they are trying to correct their children.

My Sister-in-law has the BIGGEST brat. My daughters both refuse to babysit her. She has never been told NO. Then if they manage to say no, its relented a minute later to give her what she wanted. They are SO going to have a problem with her in a few years. Once I took her to the grocery store when I was abysitting. I had told her No a hundred times - no cookies, n candy, no, no, no. She cried the whole time. I wanted to strap her to the roof of the car on the drive home just so I could get one second without a screaming three year old who should by then know that she can't get everything she wants! I understand they cry... really I do. But EVERYTIME I said no sent her in convulsions like I had just smacked her.

[PayItForward]

IMO it is just as abusive to never teach your child about sharing, patience, waiting for things etc than it is to smack them.

In both case you are not teaching the child any thing constructive

[Kfamr]

"Oh, my daughter almost went to jail... she's not that bad!"


Yeeeeeaahhh...... OKAY.

[Kfamr]

Originally posted by catnapper
They said that as little as 7 or 8 years ago, they could walk into a room, shut the door and the class would be quiet. Today, they'd have to slam the door twenty times and the class still wouldn't become quiet.

When I had Art 2d & 3d, the kids in my class would NEVER shut up for the teacher. I mean NEVER. I love art class, and things dealing with art.. so I always wanted to get started quickly. Yet, the teacher had to stand there in front of the class wtaching as everyone flapped their lips. After a few days of that, I started telling them to shut up. They stoppped talking after I told them to.

It's sad that our teacher couldn't get the class to be quiet, but she loved it... she didn't have to scream.

[dukedogsmom]

He sounds like a breeder instead of a parent. That 12yr old isn't too old to have their rear end torn up. Sounds like that's what they both need. It's their own fault for letting them grow up that way. Now they're getting payback.
LOL @ Kay. One time, in 2nd grade, the kids wouldn't shut up for my teacher either. So I stood on my desk and yelled "SHUT UP!" as loud as I could. Got me a trip to the principal. Are you sure you're not my daughter somehow??

[Lillycat]

dont get me started.....todays children and discipline are virtual strangers to each other.....as a nearly retired teacher i can testify as to "how it is".....and mostly it isnt good!

[moosmom]

It's plain and simple.....stupid parents, unruly children. I would've said, "Excuse me, I need to make an urgent phone call," and then call ANYONE!!!!!!

[AvaJoy]

I'm brat-free and thankful for it!

[Sirrahsim]

good grief! that reminds me of a horror story that one of my friends who works at the "Child Development Center" here on base told me. They are an accredited institution and because of that they have a million stupid rules to follow. The stupidest rule of all: They are not allowed to tell a child "No". This place is supposedly all about positivity. An employee can get fired on the spot if they tell a child "No". One of my friend's coworkers was working with the 3 year olds one day when one of the little curtain climbers ( ) decided to climb up onto a bookcase and jump off into a pile of pillows. The employee's only choice was to try to redirect the children's attention to something else. But then you know three years olds, if one jumps off a bookcase, they all want to. It's so dumb. The employee was not allowed to tell the kids to stop climbing on the bookcases, but then she still got in trouble when a parent saw what was going on in the moniters. (there are cameras in every room hooked up to screens in the main lobby). How in the heck are kids supposed to learn right from wrong if you can't tell them "No" or express any negative emotion at them.... Holy cow, a swat to the butt isn't going to emotionally scar a child and neither is being told "no" if they are misbehaving... *sigh* what kind of world are my kids going to grow up in

[DJFyrewolf36]

I sure wouldn't send my kid to be watched in a place that couldn't tell them "no". Positive environment my @$$! I'm positive that telling the kid to stop acting like a pill will acomplish more for his self esteem than letting him get away with EVERYTHING.
I'd be expressing some negative emotion at the place that made up all the rules to begin with

[carole]

I hear ya Richard, I think they feel it is ok for them to criticise their kids, but when you Agree with them they just don't like it, silly I know, but people are like that, as long as they do it and no-one else, then they get all defensive and try to make out their kids are not so bad after all.

It sure is nothing to be darn proud of, maybe he was just venting, inside he is probably just as worried and upset as any parent would be, its his strange way of getting it off his chest,but as I don't know the guy, who know's. Just my thoughts.

PS Avajoy, not all children are brats, and its not fair to label them as such., none of us are perfect, or have the perfect kids,but some of us are trying to raise acceptable members of society.

[luckies4me]

Originally posted by thelmalu99
I hear ya. LOL, don't even get me started on the topic of children without discipline.

I know a few people with impossible children, and when they complain, I just sit there and smile and nod my head, putting on my best 'kids will be kids' face. If I voice my opinion, I know I will get the, "What do you know? You don't have any kids", so I just zip it.

I have learned my lesson. I once worked with a woman who sat there complaining that she couldn't get her 5 year old out of her bed and into his own. Of course, in my mind, I'm thinking, it's her own fault for letting the child get used to sleeping in the bed with her and her husband every night. Now, after 5 years, she wants to complain?

I made the mistake of voicing my opinion, nicely, but saying that she must put a stop to it, because it's not healthy for the child, nor is it healthy for her marriage to have to leave their own bedroom and go to the couch any time they want to have a little intimacy.

Why did I bother? This woman had a fit and said that she was very "proud of her child-rearing decisions". So why on earth was she complaining? If she's so proud, she should be very happy that her child will probably be in high school and still be sleeping between mom and dad.

From then on, I learned to keep my mouth shut about other people's kids.

This women practices what is not as Attachment Parenting. I did it with my son and plan to do it with my future children, should I decided to have another go. It's based on intamacy with the child. Babies are held constantly, carried in baby slings close to the body, breastfed in bed, giving constant love and attention when appropriate and parents usually co-sleep with their child. I co slept with Dylan until he was 1 year old and the bond we have is truly amazing. Though I would not plan on having my five year old in bed with me, it was their decision so who are we to critisize? Sometimes parents just need to talk to someone who will listen and shut up because they are feeling stressed on that particular day. Personally I wouldn't mind letting my child sleep with me as I love spending time close to Dylan snuggling, but Dan will have nothing of it now as our bed is much too small. There are days that go by that I really miss cuddling and sleeping next to Dylan, just holding him and ejoying him while he is still small and still wants to be close to me.