So things are changing... (me & mike) - advice?

[CountryWolf07]

So, with my relationship with Mike, on May 4th, it will be 5 months. Things are still going well for both of us; we both are happy, we make eachother laugh hard every time, we still have that 'connection'/'spark'.. meanwhile, ever since I met Mike, I have spent every weekend with him and have seen him almost about everyday, right? I have been happy ever since I met him; he makes everything in my world brighter..

So, Mike will be going home every weekend now until graduation, which is in 4 weeks. I probably will go home every weekend too as well; to find a job for the summer and deal with setting up for a summer class.. anyways..

I knew what I was getting myself into, the fact Mike won't be around when I still will be at OSU in the fall. My friends who set us up together.. told me to consider thinking about it before I even got involved with him.. the fact how we'd be apart, how much work it would be, etc. We'd only be 2 1/2 hours apart. He'd be in Cleveland and I'd be here. I have this entire summer to see him too as well & I will be home. Yes, I know, have fun now, and don't worry about "later".. but I can't help it if I do. I don't know why, but I probably have to admit I'm in love already. He is.. something else to me; and I just have a strong feeling about him.

I guess, what I am trying to say.. is how do I handle this? How do I get used to not seeing him everyday or on weekends.. I am not trying to be selfish or anything.. but he means so much to me already. He knows that, I have told him that he makes me so happy, and I love being around him, I love that he makes me laugh so much and all that jazz. I have never felt anything what I'm feeling now.. about him.. than for anyone else.. ever. Usually.. I would be totally fine and get over fast over a guy; but.. something about Mike, definitely not. I just don't remember what it was like.. before I met him. It's funny, isn't it? Meeting someone like that, changing your life in a short while..

Any advice(s)? I actually got upset over this.. and I don't know why I should be, I have no reason to be at all.. because things are just fine with us right now.

[Daisy and Delilah]

I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed but I think......you both feel the same way about each other. I don't think it's one sided. Not only will you be missing Mike, he'll be missing you. There will be ways to see each other and it will happen. I wouldn't get too upset over it and don't think you're going to be seperated for long. After all, you're only 2 1/2 hours apart and you both have a common goal. Please keep us posted. Remember the old song by The Captain and Tenille?.........Love Will Keep Us Together........there you go

[columbine]

Don't beat yourself up for feeling what you feel. Love is a wild card, and for good reason. (If we had nothing that trumped the intellect, those of limited intellect would be in serious trouble, right? )

Talk with Mike. A lot. Think about shared activities (camping, going to a game, whatever) that you can schedule intermittently so you'll always have something to look forward to. And keep talking, even about feelings you think you "shouldn't" feel. "Should" and emotions are oil and water - they don't go together. You feel what you feel - talk openly about it, in between talking about heavy philosophy, silly nonsense, and day-to-day concrete stuff. Love is a dragon - you can run away from it or try to kill it, or you can ride it, but you can't pretend it's not there!

Love, Columbine

[catnapper]

I think you'll be fine. With the internet and cell phones today, you'll be connected even when you're not together. Do you know how many people met from different countries and fell in love online? I point that out because you can keep up as best you can by constant contact -- web cams, etc Not perfect but at least you'll feel like he's there.

You can keep the spark going for a few months while you finish your education then end up together in the end.

[finn's mom]

No doubt it will be hard. 2.5 hours isn't far, but it's far enough. Advice given so far sounds good to me. Talk a lot, schedule things to do...be honest. And, enjoy the ride. It's ok to upset, too...it's hard to face change like that sometimes.

[CountryWolf07]

Thanks for your advice; I really, really appreciate it. I guess, I just realized that, I have never been the kind of person to share and express my feelings so openly; and I have started to change. I know, that Mike and I are on the same page; we both know clearly how we feel about eachother. I guess I do know by the way he feels about me; just how he smiles at me, looks into my eyes and he doesn't break the gaze, it's just that.. "look". He just does so many little things that means the most. He walks up behind me and wraps his arms around me and just leans in and sort of rests his head against mine or we just kiss a "hello" that way. We have talked a little about being apart; how Mike said I have to get used to it, by fall, and it would be fine. It's just that, he looks ahead and kind of "expects" things to be okay and work out. We have plans in the next couple weeks; including this summer. We will only be 20-25 mins apart when we both are back home.. It's just that.. my mom doesn't really.. support me. She is happy for me, but she is not; more concerned if things will work out between us. But I think that my mom has gotten way too involved with what goes on in my life, kind of like "Marie" off "Everybody Loves Raymond".. but not as bad as her.. , and I have always been the private, quiet kind, until I met Mike. I can not help but blurt out about how a good guy he is and I feel so lucky to have him in my life and that I can't imagine him not ever being in it..

[Kalei]

It sounds like you two are very much in love, and if you love each other that much, you will miss each other alot, but will also make sure you will see each other.

It will literally be on your guy's priority list to see each other, and I think you will both do great at it and be fine. Don't get too upset, I think you and Mike will both get through it together

[CountryWolf07]

I definitely am in love with him; but I don't want to be the first to say those three little words.. literally. I don't even know when the right time to say it.. but I think it's supposed to happen... just comes out at the right time? It'll be 5 months on May 4th. Everything has happened on its own; and no force was made, kind of like how things fell in place and it just happened.. I think Mike is at the same place where I am, and we both aren't saying anything. We have done this before, twice in the beginning.

[buckner]

I definitely am in love with him; but I don't want to be the first to say those three little words.. literally. I don't even know when the right time to say it.. but I think it's supposed to happen... just comes out at the right time? It'll be 5 months on May 4th. Everything has happened on its own; and no force was made, kind of like how things fell in place and it just happened.. I think Mike is at the same place where I am, and we both aren't saying anything. We have done this before, twice in the beginning.

Don't push those three little words. Actions speak louder than words, and often time, people know that they are loved simply by how you treat them. So just keep loving Mike, and when the time is right, the words will be said and will be completely heartfelt.

[sparks19]

Talk on the phone as much as you guys can..... it really helps.... or even on the computer.

If you can.... get a webcam and then you can sorta see each other sometimes. it won't be the same but it really does help.

I even went so far as to take a picture of myself in the mirror so he could see what I was wearing everyday. LOL it seems silly but it helps you to visualize them when you know what they are wearing and how they look that very day

My husband and I had to be 8 hours apart for about ten months or so. it is very hard..... but if you are both willing to work at it it can be easily done. You will miss each other all the time no matter what you do.... but just remember to make time for each other even if you can't actually see one another.

Also, try to plan trips to see one another when you can.