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Our Son
I would like to thank each of you whether you were able to post or not for caring about me and my family. By keeping us in prayers, sharing your thoughts, concerns, donations, flowers, help - whatever has helped get us through this time. I would first like to post the eulogy, my husband and I gave at Rob's funeral - they were thoughts I had one of my sleepless nights.
Our Son
Rob was born 27 years ago, our second child, our only son. I will never forget his birth. The doctor went home to rest – he expected a long wait into the night. The nurses wouldn't believe me when I told them to call the doctor. They waited too long and Carl and I found ourselves in the delivery room by ourselves. He's coming, get down there and catch him I ordered Carl. Carl gave me a panicked look but just then the doctor came dashing into the room, slipped on rubber gloves and our boy quickly slid into the world. I got my boy, my son I heard his proud father say. "
He had a tough beginning – I was sick, he was sick, Amy was just two We lived in Bowling Green, Carl worked in Findlay and went to school in Toledo several nights a week. But as he grew from baby into toddler, he became the light our lives. He started talking and never stopped- until he grew into that teenage time when you can’t drag anything out of them. We moved to Findlay into a wonderful neighborhood full of kids and we became one of the Kool-aid houses on the block. Personally I think they hit all of us up and spent their time high on that stuff.
What a little guy he was! He loved the Dukes ofHazzard and when we were stopped by a train while taking Amy to kindergarten in the
afternoons, he would ask me why I just didn't jump the train like the General E. Lee. I once asked his pre-school teacher if he talked all during class like he did on that trip back and forth to St. Michael Primary School each day.
When he was five, he came down with chicken pox. Carl had just bought me a VCR for my birthday -not that I ever got to use it. Rob had Carl tape Star Wars for him and it ran non-stop for the next couple of weeks while he recovered. Soon I would hear him repeating word for word the storyline. Ithink he owned everything Star Wars. He remained a Star Wars fan until he died. He loved Yoda and I bought him every little figure I could find of Yoda. My younger sister, Julia even painted him a plaster Yoda lamp for Christmas one year and he still used it. Star Wars posters graced his home like the treasures they were to him. His aunt Beth nicknamed him R2D2 -he was
named Robert for Carl's dad so he was the second Robert and his middle name was Dale for my dad so he was the second Dale in our family --R2D2. So of course, his neurotic mother bought him every R2D2 she could find also.
He went to St. Michael Primary School and I can't begin to name the
teachers and staff who touched his life in so many ways. One thing I do remember was his having Ce Robarge ( now McKinley) for second grade. He came into second grade in the low reading section. Ce would have none of that -she had him work in both the middle and high groups until he caught up with the high group. I credit her for his lifelong love of reading. And that boy loved to read. He and I would scower the used and half price book stores so we could own all the books we wanted and more. And he read just about every kind of book there was -he was by far one of the most widest read and smartest people I have ever known.
I started a job at St Michael's for 3 evenings a week when Rob was in
Second Grade. The first week I worked, Rob fell and broke his arm playing tag with an older neighbor kid who tagged him a bit too hard. At nine o'clock I went out to the hospital arriving just in time to be there when they had to pull the arm to place the bones back together. He hadn't cried much up to then -the dr .said he could scream when he set it -and he did! That was the year he made his first Communion and they drew parts for the Mass. He was to be carry the gifts up to the altar -I just about fainted when I saw he was carrying a rather large carafe of wine toward the front of Church. What was Ce thinking letting him do that! But she said he assured her he could rest it on the cast and not spill a drop -and he did!
As a child, he played soccer but Rob just couldn't be competitive in sports. Not when there was all those other things to do while waiting for the ball to come to his end of the field. Picking dandelions, dancing around, doing Kung fu type moves, who cared what was happening with that ball. He played baseball until he was about 8 when a pitcher hit him with a ball –that was the end of that sport! He loved playing basketball when he was in the fourth, fifth, sixth grades at St. Michael's. Of course, that was the second time he broke his arm -during the father/ son game when one of the father's was a little too forceful with one of his passes.
For those of you who know my husband, he is a farmer at heart. He loves antique John Deere tractors and owns two of them and the highlight of his year is the Antique Tractor show in August at the fairgrounds each year. One summer when Rob was about 12 and Amy 14, they wanted to go with him every time he went (which he pretty well spent all day every day for the four days it runs ). I couldn't figure out the attraction until I overheard one of them saying how cool it was that Dad was letting them drive the tractors around the fairgrounds by themselves. Be still my heart. Not only was I
afraid that they would hurt themselves but how many pedestrians had to jump out of the way to avoid being run over by these two kids?
I often wonder if terrorizing the people at the fairgrounds is what
precipitated his love of Nascar racing. Tony Stewart was his favorite driver. He also loved dirt track racing and loved to attend the races here in Findlay when he worked at Oil Can Henry's during his high school years where they sponsored a car for racing. He and his father shared their love of Trans Ams. They each owned one and they were and are one of the most important things they owned. He recently told Carl if he had been Carl he would have beat he and Andy Kastner for using their belts as Batman utility belts to climb atop his car. Keeping him out of and off of the top of that car was a full time job!
Rob loved music. His choices during his high school were not our choices nor was the volume he played them. I guess he thought he had a sound proof room and it wouldn't bother any of us. As he grew older, his collection became every ecletic -he listened to everything classical to country and everything in between. I think he was competing with Fr. Marty with that although I am pretty sure Marty would beat him on "vinyls" (records to us old people ).
He went to Van Buren for High School. I am not sure he was intentionally competing with his older sister Amy for grades or what but he kept up his grade average so that he became Valedictorian of his class when he graduated instead of just the Salutarian that she was. He had to give a speech for that occasion and I can remember his Aunt Joyce asking time and again had he written his speech yet and he would just laugh and show her a 3 X 5 notecard and a cartoon he had taken from the paper. His speech was probably the shortest ever given at a graduation but his words were ever so wise. To quote some of it:
I have had many suggestions in what to say today. Some say talk about the past – We have had some good times. Others say talk about the future. But I don’t know what that will bring.
John Lennon once said “Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans. I would like to say to this senior class, Make the most of each moment. Never get so caught up in worrying about the future you forget where you are because that is the only way you can make your dreams come true.
He went to the University of Cincinnati to become a mechanical engineer. Once again he worked hard and earned the grades to prove it. He graduated with honors in 2001 and started working at his career right away with the company he co-oped with while he was attending college. Later that company closed their doors with no notice and it took him awhile to find his new job and he was often discouraged but he prevailed. His father and I were so proud of him.
We tried to raise our son up with a love of God and Church. I don't know how well we did with all that, but I know my Rob is now with God and is no longer feeling like a loner and unsure of where he fit into this crazy fast-paced world that we live in today but feeling happy and whole again meeting his paternal grandparents and his great grandparents for the first time and saying hi to his friends, Andy Kastner, John Seman, and Julie West who went before him.
The night before we learned of his death, there was a rain storm and
after it there was a double rainbow. I looked up at that rainbow and said to God, the rainbow is a sign from you - why is Rob on my mind so much and why am I worrying about him and his happiness. You will take care of him.
The next morning, when I learned of his death, I ranted and raved, screamed and yelled at God. You said I could trust in you. Why did you let this happen?
But later that morning as we sat and mourned with friends a hummingbird flitted by the window. Hummingbirds are my favorite and all my children knew that. My garden is full of plants to attract those amazing little birds. God is constantly giving us signs of his goodness and love for each one of us.
My son is with his God. We love him with all of our hearts and will miss him always.
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What a beautiful tribute to your son! (((hugs)))
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:)
You and Carl did a BEAUTIFUL Job with Rob's eulogy, Diana!! :)
That Eulogy was delivered, in firm, clear voices, by Diana and Carl
standing in front of the crowded St. Michael's Church ...
A Wonderful Tribute to Rob!
I don't think there was a dry eye in the Church when they finished.
You Two gave Rob a Very Loving send-off - Be Proud!
/s/ :( Phred
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What a beautiful tribute to your son, who must have been a wonderful person. It must seem like those 27 years that you had him were just a second or two, now that he is gone. But his memory will live on, and I hope that can give you a little bit of consolation. You will be included in my prayers for a long, long time, because I know that the grief is only just beginning for you.
Take care..................
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Diana,
What a beautiful eulogy. I feel like I knew him a little better
through your words. As a mother myself, I can imagine the
great sense of hurt & loss from losing your child. He was a
very good looking boy & I'm sure you were all very proud of him.
I pray God grant you comfort & peace during this terrible time
of grief. Rob is at peace now and I'm sure God is answering all
his questions first hand. {{{HUGS}}} Liz.
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Please accept my condolences....godspeed to Rob.
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What a beautiful tribute to a beloved son. How brave of you to be able to sit down and share this with all of us.
My heart goes out to you in your loss.
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He was a very handsome young man. I'm sorry you're having to go through this. Maybe that writing about him will help you start to heal a little.
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My sincerest condolences to you and your family. May God comfort you all during this very difficult time. :(
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Bless your family...
and what a loving tribute to your beloved son...
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Thank you for sharing your memories of Rob with us. It is amazing to see puppy pictures of Oreo with rob, and then to know that they are reunited.
You and your whole family will be in our prayers.
Rest in peace, Rob.
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The tribute for your son was wonderful. I am so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what you are going through right now, but just remember that time will heal. Your family are still in my prayers.
Just remember that Pet Talk is here for you.
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Touching
Beautiful
God Speed
Love
Michelle
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Thank you for sharing your son with us.
Johanna
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I'm so sorry for your loss. It sounds like he was a good man. Bless you and your family.
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That is a beautiful tribute to you son. I'm so sorry. My thoughts and prayers are still with all of your family.
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I had hoped you would share the eulogy, it was so well written, and will give our PT friends a chance to know Rob.
I want to echo my mom is thanking each of you for caring about us and keeping us in your thoughts.
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Diana, Carl that was very touching. Thank you for the chance to get to know your son through your words and pictures.
Thoughts and prayers for you and your family.
Love
Anna & Mark
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What a wonderful family. I'm so sorry that you all are having to go through such a heavy time. I hope you will see double rainbows and hummingbirds all the time. What a nice tribute. Thank you for sharing such a private time with us.
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What a wonderful and loving tribute. Thank you very much for sharing Rob with all of us. You will all remain in my thoughts and prayers.
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What a beautiful tribute to your son. Very well written and I could imagine him doing those things in my mind. It was very touching, especially the photos. I am so sorry for your loss. God is with you to guide you through this difficult time.
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As a mother, I know this is one of the hardest things you have ever done, Diana, Carl, too. And for Amy and Christy, to lose their brother had to be devastating as well. Your words are just perfect and I am so glad you have introduced us to your boy.
Rest in peace, Rob.
Logan
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I am so deeply sorry. I can't even imagine the grief you are going threw at this time, but know that my thoughts and prayers are with you. Rob is at peace now. He's in good hands. I am so sorry. I don't know what else to say. God bless.
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Such a lovely eulogy, Diana and Carl. Thank you for sharing such sweet and loving memories with us. I could feel the love in your words and pictures. My thoughts and prayers are still with you and the entire family. May God help you through this most difficult time and ease your grief.
Rest In Peace, Rob.
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What a beautiful tribute. Rob was such a light in this life, surely his light goes on. What wonderful pictures of he & Oreo as a puppy - and now they are back together. Sounds like he was welcomed with open arms by many friends and family on the other side.
Diana, in California I was told that the Indians believe the hummingbird is the messenger of God, because of how it flies straight up to heaven!
You are in our prayers, Pat & JoJoe
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Oh Diana and Carl and family, while I didn't know Rob - I know and love the rest of his family.
God must have been holding you up during that eulogy b/c I couldn't even get thru it without LES.
My heart breaks for you and I keep you in my thoughts and healing prayers.
If any of you need anything please let me know....
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{{Holding you guys in my thoughts and prayers.}}
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Thanks for sharing this wonderful tribute of Rob with us. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. RIP Rob.
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I'm so sorry for your loss. :(
Thank you for sharing this with us.
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Having lost my dear mom a month ago, I feel your pain. I am sobbing as I type. I'm so sorry. Rob sounds like a wonderful person with a beautiful soul. Thank you for sharing your eulogy and pictures.
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What a wonderful and touching tribute to your son Rob!
Please accept my sincerest condolances!!
RIP Rob!!
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Thankyou for sharing your beautiful tribute. You are in my prayers.
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Thank you so much for sharing this with us. I lost my Dad in March so understand a little of your grief. With lots of love to a fellow PTer - God bless
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What a beautiful tribute to a very special son. I know it must have been difficult to read all of that, as I prepared and read a eulogy for my mother-in-law just a month ago. Mine was short and I managed to get through it but I worried that I might not. I am sure God gave you the strength you needed to read it so that your words might be a blessing and comfort to those in attendance. You have a very special family and I am honored to have *met* you all through this remarkable place called Pet Talk.
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What a wonderful tribute to a wonderful son. So sad that he was called home so soon. :(
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What a beautiful tribute. I am so very sorry for your loss. Hugs and prayers to you and your family that God will be with you to comfort you and help you. Thank you for sharing your wonderful memories with us.
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What a beautiful tribute. We should all be remembered so beautifully.
I will continue to keep your family in my thoughts and prayers.
robinh
