I lost it last night...don't feel so poorly...
Last night both cats were at each other - howling, hissing, attacking....so I started screaming at them....they cleared out....it did stop them and gave them something more important to focus on for a change. Both of them headed for parts unknown, as I am sure they thought I was going off the deep end. They were very quiet the rest of the evening.
Things are not running as smoothly as I had hoped. I have been through this before, with two adult cats and it worked out eventually. Miley is so darn whiney and screams every time Ti comes near her. That sets him off on a major league challenge to GET HER. Then everything goes right to hell. It is so difficult to listen to..... I have such a peaceful house and for me to yell like that is upsetting to me too.
So Kelly, don't feel as though you have given up - just changed your plan. Some cats are not meant to be in a herd, some are. I hope my two change their minds. It seems to me that it took weeks when I had the last two adults get mixed up (not including Gabe, who fit in so very nicely....)....
Sometimes things just do not work out. We have all been there!
Concentrate on your current furry friends - and let Oliver go to a different home.....You gave him a chance.
Sas