Printable View
Thank you for making me feel better about this decision. I just feel so bad about how I've treated him...I know it was necessary when we were keeping him, now it just seems cruel to me. I know he isn't mad at me.
I will give him lots of love tonight...I hope he know how much I love him. I just want him to be happy. I know he will, he's a great kitty.
Please don't think you were cruel to Oliver because you yelled at him and squirted him with water. I've bout drowned Chester several times when he scratches the door. If I didn't yell at them once in a while, they'd think I was sick. It's not cruel, it's human. They know very well what they ought not do but like to test us by doing it anyway. That's called being a cat. You did your best with Oliver. Maybe his new owner wasn't it a position to get him yet and his stay with you was like a stay in a hotel until his new owner could get him. There are no coincidences you know. ;)
:D :D Too funny MOFF. :D :D And I agree, sometimes I think they're like little kids and they do things they know they're not supposed just so we do yell at them. ;)Quote:
Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces
I've bout drowned Chester several times when he scratches the door. If I didn't yell at them once in a while, they'd think I was sick. ;)
You were being responsible and trying to discipline him. That's what all loving parents do, especially when there are other kitties to think of.
Last night both cats were at each other - howling, hissing, attacking....so I started screaming at them....they cleared out....it did stop them and gave them something more important to focus on for a change. Both of them headed for parts unknown, as I am sure they thought I was going off the deep end. They were very quiet the rest of the evening.
Things are not running as smoothly as I had hoped. I have been through this before, with two adult cats and it worked out eventually. Miley is so darn whiney and screams every time Ti comes near her. That sets him off on a major league challenge to GET HER. Then everything goes right to hell. It is so difficult to listen to..... I have such a peaceful house and for me to yell like that is upsetting to me too.
So Kelly, don't feel as though you have given up - just changed your plan. Some cats are not meant to be in a herd, some are. I hope my two change their minds. It seems to me that it took weeks when I had the last two adults get mixed up (not including Gabe, who fit in so very nicely....)....
Sometimes things just do not work out. We have all been there!
Concentrate on your current furry friends - and let Oliver go to a different home.....You gave him a chance.
Sas
Thanks again.... :)
Sas, I have to tell you....I was laughing while reading your post...I know exactly what you mean, as if I were there! :)
I'm glad I'm not alone guys. :)
Yes, SAS and MOFF are absolutely right. Even I have lost it with my babies several times. I always feel bad about it later, but it happens to the best of us! :p
Good luck tomorrow. Just think about how happy Oliver will be in the appropriate home and how happy your other 5 will be too:)
**hugs**
That's a great strategy, SAS! It's kind of like brothers and sisters that don't get along until someone from "outside" comes in and threatens one of them. The next thing you know they are best of buddies and gang up on the "outsider." Now I know you don't want to be an outsider, but maybe they will join forces and commiserate (is that the right word?) about what a crab you are and the next thing you know they'll be best of buddies. :)Quote:
Originally posted by sasvermont
Last night both cats were at each other - howling, hissing, attacking....so I started screaming at them....they cleared out....it did stop them and gave them something more important to focus on for a change. Both of them headed for parts unknown, as I am sure they thought I was going off the deep end. They were very quiet the rest of the evening.
Please don't take this the wrong way, I'm not being sarcastic and I really don't mean to call you a crab because I know you're not, I just really think this might be a new strategy to try to get them together. At least they were quiet for the rest of the evening. ;) :) :D
And you know, Kelly, SAS really does have a point. I'm sure we've all yelled at our cats at one point or another. It doesn't mean you're being cruel, you're just trying to get them to understand. And even if they don't understand the words that you're saying, I know they understand the tone of voice. :)
(really hope I didn't offend anyone with this post) :)
:) That is very reassuring!! I know we all tend to yell at them every now and then....can't allow them to be naw-tee-kats. ;)Quote:
Originally posted by Tubby & Peanut's Mom
And you know, Kelly, SAS really does have a point. I'm sure we've all yelled at our cats at one point or another. It doesn't mean you're being cruel, you're just trying to get them to understand. And even if they don't understand the words that you're saying, I know they understand the tone of voice. :)
(really hope I didn't offend anyone with this post) :)
It helps to remember that they DO understand the tone, in both good and bad situations. Thanks for the reminder. :)
I'm so sorry to hear about Oliver. You did what is in his best interest. I had a Korat named Tucker who was pouncing on Casey imercifully. I knew that Tucker needed to be an only cat. He now has the run of a 3 story house and the love of two people that think he's the cat's meow. While I was torn up over it, I knew in my heart I had made the right decision.
Kelly, go with your instincts. Do what is best for Oliver and your other kitties. Call me if ya need me :D
Sorry to be late here Kelly - I reckon everyone has said it so well.
I'm hurting for you - but it must be the only decision left to you. The other furbabies must come into the equation and he'll be much happier as a 'King of the Castle'. You did your best and your making sure his next home realise he needs to be alone!
Please give Oliver a couple of head scratchies. xxx
{{{{Hugs}}} to his very caring Meowmie.
Lynne
I agree.. don't worry about yelling at him or having squirted him with water.... We've all done that when they are being brats!
They KNOW what not to do, I think they just want to see if you still love them enough to notice ;) I think if I slacked on my kids and let them try to get where they know they aren't supposed to, they would think they weren't loved anymore!
I am sure they know not to do whatever it is.. as for the WHY behind it.. i really don't think they know that it's because "it could hurt them... they could get stuck...insert common sense reason here" but more of "we shouldn't do this because then she tells us NO, and if we STILL don't listen, she says it LOUDER and LOUDER until we get the point..and if we dont, she will come OVER to us and tell us NO while moving us away...what a grouch and spoil sport!" :D
I tell ya, I catch them starting to do a no no and they PEEK and see if i'm watching.. and if I don't say something, thinking "they'll stop cuz they saw me watching" they go at it again until i say no.. then they walk off with this look like "A HA! she does still luv us!"
But really, you gave it your all with Oliver, and i'm sure he knows you love him, but he just wants to be king.. and know that we know that, he can find that perfect one cat home just for him, and he'll still know that humans aren't the bad guys! :)
I am sorry things didn't work out with Oliver. He is a beautiful cat and I'm sure he will find a new home where he can be happy and indulged. You did the best for him and for your furfamily. I hope you will be able to meet with his new owners and make sure everything will be okay for him.
Don't feel bad .... hey, how would you like to have ummmm 22 in your house, all from different "walks of life"??? hehehe
I spend my entire day trying to separate potential enemies, and gradually trying to make kitties learn to accept eachother!!! hehehe.... you can imagine the amount of chocolate I could consume in a days time!!! ;) ;) :D
We all do the best we can in this life, and as long as we always strive for our best, then we are right where we need to be!!! :)
You have not been cruel to Oliver, you have done what no one did before - you got to know him, you tried to help him, and you loved loved loved him. Now, when he is at the shelterm it will be with a note that he needs to be an only cat. Think how happy he will be when that actually happens! :)
Some kitties (and some people, too) just don't play well with others of their species. Oliver's one! :) It's just part of what makes him him, just like his shiny fur and pretty eyes.
{{{hug to Kelly}}}
If you need anything please email me!!
Thinking of you!
Oops! How did I miss this?! :o :o
I'm so sorry that things have not worked with Oliver. :( I know you love him very much, but its not fair to your other cats, or to Oliver, if they have to live in "threatened mode" all the time. Olver will be grateful to you for rehoming him in a place where he'll have no other kitty to worry about, and your other kitties will thank you too. You tried your best. Its not your fault. Some animals just like to be alone, and if Oliver's that type, he will be much happier in a single cat household. You are doing the right thing. Please don't be upset. :(
I'm sorry Oliver didn't work out Kelly. You guys are wonderful for trying so hard with him...but you can't make the rest of your cats miserable for one...it'snot fair to any of them. I know this is a decision you have put a lot of thought into and are doing what is best for everyone. I hope Oliver finds anew home quickly, where he can get thelove and attention he needs as an only cat.
Kelly I'm sorry to be getting in on this so late, but I do agree with everyone who has posted on this already. It's a shame that Oliver couldn't settle in and be a happy kitty with the others but you have to do what you have to do in order for peace to reign in your household. We completely understand.
I had to laugh at SAS' post regarding a raised voice. When I come into the kitchen and see one of my boys on the table and I say "off!" they give me a look and may or may not get off. When my hubby comes in and says the same thing they are off like streaks of lightning. Voice tone matters and the louder the better I think. :) In fact, Trevor will jump off just at the sight of him. :rolleyes:
LOL Pam - just what happens here! I bawl them out and they look at me like 'I don't think so'! Don speaks very strictly and they all jump and run!!Quote:
Originally posted by Pam
I had to laugh at SAS' post regarding a raised voice. When I come into the kitchen and see one of my boys on the table and I say "off!" they give me a look and may or may not get off. When my hubby comes in and says the same thing they are off like streaks of lightning. Voice tone matters and the louder the better I think. :) In fact, Trevor will jump off just at the sight of him. :rolleyes:
And with having Tricky with us at the moment - it's just the same! I open the door and ask her if she'd like to go for a wee-wee - no movement!! Don just says 'Tricky - go on' she's outta the door in a flash and doing whatever she has to do!! I give up!
Lynne
Kelly, years ago a beautiful black and white kitty showed up in my yard. He immediately started fighting with my little calico female and my black cat Magic. He was such a beautiful cat that I really wanted to keep him - but there was just no way it was going to happen.
One of my client's was looking for a kitty and I told them about this beautiful cat. They visited and couldn't believe their eyes when they saw him. They took him home and showered him with love and attention. He immediately took to the husband, but not to the wife. He was a man's cat - through and through!
When they would tell me stories, I could not believe this was the same cat - he had turned into a mush ball and he still is - and he is now 13 years old.
Bless you for even giving Oliver a chance....there is someone out there who will love having an only cat and I bet Oliver will turn into a mush ball too!
Try not too feel so bad about Oliver, i can tell its a decision you have not taken lightly, its a real shame, for all of you, i really hope he finds a good home, if its one on one he may be much better and happier in the long run.
Let us know how it goes and when he finds a new placement, he is a lovely looking puss i am sure he will be snapped up soon, heres hoping.
Kelly I just loved Gini's story. I am sure Oliver will find a home where he feels much better because he has the undivided attention of his purrents and all the others also will arrange themselves in a much more peaceful way. (You know I just have 2 brothes who can be best buddies sometimes but I also have fur on the floor every week:rolleyes: )
I had the same trouble with Smoke who was used to living in a Garage , and was on the dirty side. She couldnt chase the other cats as she was obese , but swattred them when they came too close. I was looking for another home for her when she had a bad stroke and had to be put down, I think that if she was cleaner and not so mean , I would have fought more foe her , but it was better foe the other cats , and for me not finding feces and pools of urine everwhere!
well there may be people that don't agree, that think it is cruel to give up a cat, but, which is more cruel, to give it up so it has a second chance at being placed in the kind of home it needs, or to keep it unhappy, along with the other cats unhappy?Quote:
I know that not everyone will agree with our decision.
I think you are doing the right thing, and I know it was not easy for you to make the decision. I'm sorry this happend to you.