I'm praying that we get Nathan back home tomorrow. But I'm scared to hope on it because what if it doesn't happen? I know if we don't get him back tomorrow I'm going to be crushed.
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I'm praying that we get Nathan back home tomorrow. But I'm scared to hope on it because what if it doesn't happen? I know if we don't get him back tomorrow I'm going to be crushed.
Keeping fingers crossed for you mate.Quote:
Originally Posted by sumbirdy
Wom
We've got it all crossed for you sweetheart. Praying hard that you get little Nathan back.
Thank you.
You are in all my good thoughts, Sumbirdy; I hope that tomorrow you have Nathan back safe and happy with you and your Dad.
I have been following this thread and thinking of you and your family ever since I first read it(even though I never post). I pray that everything works out and that Nathan gets to come home with you. I pray that his mother gets what she deserves and that her little boy with grow up in your household where he is safe and dearly loved. God bless you all. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Mom just talked to the caseworker. They probably won't pick her up until tomorrow (they have no clue when the other county is going to get her Monday and they can only hold her 72 hours.) She has a say in where she wants Nathan to go but ultimately it's up to Charles where he stays (I just hope she doesn't tell him where to leave Nathan and Charles just goes along with it) When she gets picked up we get notified and then we are going out with a policeman to talk to Charles (just so there's no trouble if those other people are there) I know if mom and dad talk to Charles they can work something out and Charles may even let us bring Nathan home with us. (I'm praying that's the case)
Anyway what this all comes down to is another day without Nathan.
my prayers are for nathans' prompt return to the loving stable home he has known. kindest regards, joyce
Maybe they will pick her up this evening. It would probably be better to do it tomorrow though just in case the other county is late picking her up, so they won't have to let her go. I just wish I could fast forward until this was all over and Nathan was here living with us. The waiting and not knowing is killing me. There's also the chance that if the police show up at her door then she won't answer (she was given instructions not to answer when the people she is staying with aren't home) So maybe if they pick her up tomorrow those people won't be working and will be home and the police will see their van in the driveway and know they're home. I don't know. I just wish I knew what was going to happen. I wish I knew for sure that we would get Nathan back.
Well, still nothing. I guess by now they decided to pick her up tomorrow. (?) The warrant is outstanding so I know she will be picked up before Monday. (Does the police pick up people on Sundays?)
Police pick people up 24/7 - 365 days a year.Quote:
Originally Posted by sumbirdy
Quote:
Originally Posted by Craftlady
Well, that's good to know.
Would this help us any?
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm...ndID=130320714
It's Stephanies Myspace page stating that she doesn't want any kids.
You'd have to show it to your dad, and he would have to check with DSH.
{{{{hugs}}}}
They still have not arrested her (or if they did they have not notified us, which they said they would) It's past 3:00 and I don't know why it's taking them so long. Maybe they don't think of it as an emergency. (?) Or maybe the people she is staying with work on Saturdays and she's not answering the door. Anyway she has a court date Monday and dad said that if she shows up (unescorted by police officers) he is going to the police station (which is right next to the court house) and asking them about it.
But I just want Nathan away from her. She needs help and he's not safe there.
Curious, her myspace page shows 1 friend, Tom. Says that she is single and doesn't want any kids. Isn't that all contradictory to her current state!? I definately think the caseworker needs to know about this information.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Queen of Poop
Tom is on everyone's friend list. He is the creator or something. But yes, it does say she is single and doesn't want kids. (Which are both things you have to pick, they are not atomatically set on them) We have a printed copy of hers. Charles' had said in February the same thing but in April he changed it to proud parent but it still says that he is single.
There is also a lady that used to work with Stephanie that we know. This lady had no idea Stephanie had a son. Stephanie had told her that she didn't have any kids and never wanted any.
I'm sorry this is happening to you. :( I will pray that you get Nathan back. {hugs}
It is another sleepless night. Every time I close my eyes I see little Nathan and can't help but cry. Is he scared, I wonder. I know he has to miss us and wonder where we are at. That hurts most of all. I don't want him to think we have abandoned him. We are the only family he knows. This house is the only house he knows. Poor baby has been forced to live with strangers and sleep in a house and a crib that he doesn't know. He never did well with sleeping in an unfamiliar place. Every time we had to go somewhere and spend the night somewhere else he would cry all night long. And that was with us with him. How much worse is it with people he does not know? How could someone be so cruel and do this to a child?
Well, I got to see Nathan today, and hold him. But for only like 2 minutes. The other county has dropped their charges on Stephanie so she no longer has a warrant out for her. (They dropped the day after we filed charges, which seems a little fishy) Charles said we could come by and see Nathan. Mom couldn't bear seeing him but not being able to take him home so dad stayed in the car while I went to their door. Nathan acted like a totally different child. He acted like he didn't know me and I didn't see him smile once. (He always smiles for strangers, he loves people) He had a slight reddish rash on his face. Charles wanted to take him out to the car to see my parents but Stephanie wouldn't let him. She thought we were just going steal him (we're not that stupid) so she tried to take him from my arms but I wouldn't (couldn't) let him go. She threatened to call the police (what would they have done? Charles invited me there and Nathan is my nephew. Besides the house is under Charles' name, not hers) I finally had to let Nathan go because she was tugging so hard I thought she would hurt him. I told her that if she cared about him she would have got him a long time ago (like when they got a house) She just said "Whatever". She didn't even say that she did care for Nathan. Then she went inside with Nathan and starting cursing Charles and screaming at him.
I will never forget that look in Nathan's eyes. Like someone who has seen so much. And he's only a little over a year old. That's sad.
I feel so helpless, like there's nothing we can do and it's so physically and emotionally draining. I told Charles that if he didn't make things better (not necessarily by giving Nathan to us, but letting us be freely able to see him and take him places like out to get ice cream, the zoo, or over to our house for the weekend, normal stuff that grandparents and aunts should be able to do with their grandchildren and nephew/niece) then he lost his parents, sister, and probably brother too. She has said so much about us, lies and hurtful things, and he never once stood up for us, he just let it happen. He said he is trying to make things right but I don't believe him anymore. As far as I'm concerned I only have one brother and his name isn't Charles. I would leave someone who has talked about my parents the way she has. My sister-in-law, Dana said that if she said half the things about my parents that Stephanie has then she would expect Bobby (my oldest brother) to leave her. But Charles just stands by us and lets her say these things, lets her crush us. Then he trys to say he loves us. I don't believe that.
It's been a very bad day. All hope seems to be lost but I love Nathan so much that I will never give up on this. Like I have said before, I will fight until he is 18. I will know where he is at (not stalking, just knowing his location and if he's safe and happy) I want to keep up with his well-being. I will not let her win. I cannot let her win. This is not over.
This is the last post I will be posting on this thread unless something drastically changes. I have to face the fact that Nathan is more than likely never coming back (not even to visit) and also that he is Charles' child and Charles will have to deal with the emotional problems of a little boy who never feels a mothers love and sees her scream at his father (and more than likely him) and lash out and hit. The system (child welfare) is so screwed up. We had told them we seen her abuse him in November but they said it "has to have been more recent" so basically he has to be hurt before they will do anything. They've heard things from countless people (even people who work for them) that have told them how she is and how she cannot control her anger and how she is violent but overall it is up to the person that is over everybody to say if they go get him...and she says no. Basically he has to be beaten first. This place obviously doesn't look at emotional abuse. If you had seen Nathan when he was living here and then again yesterday you would have seen a big difference. It is obvious, so incredibly obvious, that he is not happy and that he has already been emotionally abused. Now it is only a matter of time, when Stephanie thinks it is all over and she is no longer being watched, that the physical abuse will start. (Well, actually, continue since it already started when she was living with us) It is up to Charles to protect him and keep his safe and I'm not sure that he will.
I'm going to use my mental Backspace button to delete Charles from ever being my brother and Stephanie from ever entering my life. But I cannot delete Nathan. I will think of him everyday, I will always worry about him and what she has done. Please keep Nathan in your prayers. Pray that she will not hurt him too bad (preferably not at all, but I know that she will) Please keep us in your thoughts as well, that we will move on, that we will continue to survive and live. Because honestly right now the thing I want to do the most is just go to sleep...and never...never wake up.
i am so sorry that this has happened. i will keep nathan and you and your family in my prayers
I will keep you and Nathan in my prayers, Sumbirdy. I thought your Dad had applied for custody...I hope something can still be worked out.
Up around here, I believe that Family Services HAS to investigate a complaint, even if anonymous.
If you guys could go visit once again - hide a tape recorder. That might be the only thing you could do.
Aw, I'm so sorry sumbirdy. Regardless, I'll still be thinking of you.
Keep that journal going, some day you'll be able to give it to him, even if you have to wait until he's 18.
We have a friend who one day, out of the blue, got a phone call. It was from his nephew, that his sister had had taken away by DSS years and years before. DSS was right to do so, she never took care of, barely fed, changed, etc. her kids, moved in with her brothers and expected them to do so. Well, 13 years later, our friend got a phone call, and his nephew had been adopted and raised by a nice family, was a teenager, and decided to try to find his uncles. They reconnected and have a nice relationship now.
*hugs*
I'm so sorry all of this has happened. I feel so scared for Nathan. For now all i can do is try and send protective white light for him and say prayers.
Hey, as i was emailing a friend (who's sort of part of a prayer chain) a thought came to me.
Would getting an investigative news source involved help? Sometimes they can be quite persuasive. Either local news, or something like 20/20. Usually these tiny organizations don't like these things going national.
I hate the spotlight and never would have considered this. I've seen it suggested to others in the past and have seen the wonders it can do. I know you said you'd stop at nothing to get him back, so i thought i'd throw this out there. I understand though if you don't want to go this route.
Hmm...I don't know. I wouldn't even know where to begin on how to do that. I don't even know where our local news station is. :oQuote:
Originally Posted by crow_noir
All local news stations have websites with email address for the reporters.
Guess who's here?! NATHAN!!!!! Well, he's only here until Monday. Charles finally put his foot down and said that she can't keep Nathan away from his extended family (especially since we are the only family he has known for all his life) So he's here until Monday!!! Yay!!! I can't tell you how happy I am.
We're going to work out some arrangement. It's either going to be Nathan stays here for 5 days, there 10, he stays here for 5 days, there 7, or he stays here for 7 days, there 10. I don't know what it'll be. But this is better than nothing.
He has 7 teeth (two more from when he left here) and he can't take a couple of steps by himself. The only thing really different is that it's harder to get him to smile. I've attached pics and I couldn't get him to smile (before he would smile at anything) And he's got flea bites all over him. I think these five days will be a welcome break from all the screaming he probably hears every day. This way he will know there are nice people in the world and not everyone yells.
*Sniff**Sniff* I smell poo. :) I can't tell you how happy I'm going to be to change this poopy diaper. (Never thought I would say that)
* SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAM * :D
OMG!!!! *hug* *spinny hug*
That is so freaken awesome!!! I know it's not the best case scenario but it's better than bleak.
I'm all teary eyed and sniffly now. I'm SO happy for you all.
Oh, yay! Congratulations most of all to Charles, for realizing, and for putting his foot down.
That is AWESOME!!!!! :D :D :D
I hope there will still be some charges against Stephanie...and/or that Charles realizes Nathan should be with you folks most of the time if he just can't give him the care he needs all the time.
I hope your dad informs DSH about the flea bites...and less smiling....
Does your family still have an application for custody?
I am so happy too! Stephanie was all in fake mommy mode when mom and dad got him. ( I didn't go with them) All teary eyed and saying she will miss him and stuff. :rolleyes: After 11 1/2 months of only seeing him about every 3 months or so (sometimes longer) and not even seeming to care when she was with him, she's not gonna make us believe this one. You don't just automatically switch from who gives a dang to perfect mommy. She tried to tell mom how to take care of him (like we hadn't raised him for nearly a year! And she didn't bother to ask us anything about him when they came and took him)
Anyway she's saying that she doesn't want him here every so often but Charles said that's the way it's gonna be and dang it we're going to hold him to it! Plus adult protective service was there to have a little chat with them and said they better make mom happy or they were pressing charges. I bet that scared 'em!
Nathan is so clingy now. Every time I try to put him to bed he cries and holds his arms up to me, so he's still awake (It's midnight here). I can't get enough of holding him.
We're having a late birthday party tomorrow. :p
Here's some more pics of me and him.
In the last one it looks like he's asleep but really he's just looking down.
I don't think she has any charges against her and Charles has changed his story about how good of a mom she is (from bad to great) so many times that I don't know what he believes anymore.Quote:
Originally Posted by Catty1
We talked to DHS about him not being as happy but they said they can't go get him because he's not happy.
Dad was trying to get legal guardianship but found out he can't do that unless both parents sign their consent (even if she was in jail)
Well, after a few more visits with Nathan, and with Adult Protective Services checking on them....you never know what the future may bring.
Hugs and prayers!
I'm so glad you get to see Nathan! :D
About four this morning I woke up to the most awful crying. It was heart wrenching. He sounded so scared and when I picked him up he cried harder until he heard my voice. Then he hushed a little and I walked him around the room talking to him and he snuggled against me. I guess at first he thought he was back at Stephanie's house and that it was Stephanie picking him up. I never heard him cry like that in his whole life. It makes me wonder what she has done to him. Every time I tried to put him back in his bed he would cry and finally at about six or six-thirty we both fell asleep with him on my chest.
When he lived here before he was fine with playing by himself in his room for a few minutes while we did something (like wash the dishes or laundry) but now if we get out of his eyesight he starts crying until we come back and pick him up.
Last night he when I gave him a bath he acted like he hadn't had a bath in forever (and smelled like it too) and mom said when they picked him up his clothes he was wearing were filthy. She asked Stephanie if he had just ate and she said "No, he's just a boy." which basically means "No, I just don't clean him up." I'm ok with letting kids get dirty but don't just let them sit in the filth! Mom took the shirt off that he was wearing and was going to take it to show DHS how filthy they keep him but Stephanie snatched it away from her.
The bumps he has all over him have gotten bigger and redder so we're going to take him to the doctor either today or tomorrow to find out just what they are.
We're pouring on the love with Nathan and he's beginning to smile a little more. We're going to show him the best we can what it's like to be loved unconditionally every minute of the day. Pretty soon he's going to start noticing the difference between us and his mother.
I hope your mom brings him home next time and THEN takes the shirt to DHS.
I mean...any normal mom would have their kid clean and fresh cloths for a visit.
I am glad he is starting to smile. I still pray for positive things in the future.
I hope the bumps are easily treatable...does DHS get a copy of Nathan's medical reports?
HUGS!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Catty1
Mom said the shirt was just so gross that she had to take it off then. She couldn't stand to leave it on him any longer. All Stephanie sent with him was a few diapers and a sippy cup. We have everything for him but still...wouldn't you think a mother would like to send her son off with a favorite toy or something? Mom went and bought him a new shirt to wear home and another shirt "just because". He has a lot of clothes here but mom just thought it would be nice to buy him something new. She also bought him new toys to play with (although he has zillions here). :p We reunited him with his favorite stuffed monkey and frog and he was excited to see them again.
I don't know if DHS gets a copy of his medical reports. I guess we could have one faxed to them. :confused:
Anyway, Nathan is now taking his afternoon nap and I had to stay in the room with him until he went to sleep. He kept his eyes fixed on me until he couldn't hold them open any longer.
It's going to be so hard letting him go Monday but we are going to go get him again the Monday after and keep him another five days I think.