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OMG my grandma died the same way except she had recovered from breast cancer and was suffering from enphysima and athsma and all these breathing problems. Shehad been in the hospitl at least 30 times that year but made it out everytime. So then finally she just died. I know I'm not putting it in a nice way but I cannot help it. The only thing was that I never shed a tear. I never cry when death occurs. I do not remember how many relatives in my family screamed at me for being rude and insensitive at the wake because I didn't cry. God they are so mean:mad:. But I just take it as that they can never suffer, no more pain, so why cry if they are doing better and probably happier. But anyway this is your problem and not mine so I am going to focus on the topic::
I am so sorry about your grandfather. I have read stories in books like Chicken Soup where friends and family have suffered from the loss of loved ones from lukemia. I have never gone to a funeral, because my mom insists that they are too boring for me but I just think she doesn't want me to see her cry her eyes out. But at least he does not have to fight the lukemia anymore and can be up in heaven with his mom and dad and soon we will all be there too. I'm glad the kitty is doing good. Give her a big smooch for me. :)
{{{Hugs}}} Britt
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Dear Ann , My sincere condolences on the loss of your beloved grandpa ! I can fully understand how devastated you are feeling about not having been there when your grandpa passed away ... ! I am still blaming myself for not having been there when my sweetheart Sydney left for the RB ... I know , I know , some will say , that was ONLY a cat ... and that I cannot compare that .. .
But to me , it is the same thing !! If it is about a beloved pet or person , the grief is the same for me . I am sure you do agree with me here , Ann .
It makes me happy that you were able to keep little Kattja(lovely name !!) , and pull her through her awfull start in this world . She will be gratefull to you foreven and ever , that is a certainty !!!
If you need more venting , feel free to post here or send a PM ; we are one big family ; we are there to comfort each other in good AND bad days !!:)
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your web-page
I've just visited your home-page . My oh my ,Ann , it is fantastic !! You have a gift for writing ! I am so glad that your boyfriend Lev was finally able to get that permit ! You sure love each other very very much !!:D
I was so happy too , to find so many pics of all your pets , especially little Kattja ...! Such a cutie-pie !
Have good luck with anything you do in the future , Ann ; you surely deserve to be happy after all the trouble you went through ...!http://www.uselessgraphics.com/fwlr7.gif
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Hi again everyone... Thanks for all the wonderful responses, for visiting and signing my guestbook and most of all; thanks for being there. I truly and honestly appreciate that. Thank you all...
I visited my grandma yesterday, for the first day since my grandpa passed away. And boy was it hard... Everywhere there was memories and I was just expecting to see my grandpa popping in to sit in his chair and everything... I helped my grandma set the table for coffee as usual and I set out one cup too many and it was just awful... My dad had told my grandma bout how I felt bad about not being with him when he passed away and my grandma said that both she and my grandpa wanted me to remember him the way he was when he was healthy and not the way he was for the last part of his life and I just went to the bathroom and cried my eyes out... I have a major problem with crying in front of people so that's why I did it. Tomorrow, on Sunday, I'm going to church at 11 in the morning cause they always says everyone's names that has passed away the last week in our town and they will say my grandpa's name... I hope I won't break down again. And then Thursday... I just want it over with. I've been to one funeral before, my greatgrandpas and it was the worst thing I ever went through...
For everyone who told me bout their loved ones passing away too, I am so sorry... You have my deepest sympathy and heartwarm thoughts.
Lut, I share your opinions totally and I think most people agree too here at Pet Talk: It's just as horrible and sad when your animal dies as if it was a human. My pets are my family members too, just as much as my mom or anyone else.
And another thing bout obituaries; how come you can't put them in for your pet?! That's not fair either...
Thanks once again for all your wonderful responses, I can't thank you enough, it really means a lot to me so thanks.
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I had wanted to respond earlier, but I didn't really know what to say. I lost my Grandma a year ago. I lived with her, and one day I came home from school and the paper was still in the mailbox, and I knew something was wrong.. I thought she had fallen but when I went upstairs I couldn't wake her up. I felt a lot of guilt - like I should have known and I should have been able to help or something.. I still feel guilty about it. I'm really sorry you weren't there to say goodbye, but I think he knows. He knows how much you love him and I'm sure he didn't hold it against you that you weren't there.. he's at rest now and his legacy will live on in you and your family.
I'm very sorry about your loss, and I hope that with time the pain isn't as raw. For me, remembering Nan's funny stories was a big help.. when I sit with my family and reminise (I don't know if I spelled that right) it's like she never really left.
I hope you are feeling better,
Naomi
((((hugs))))
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Thank you Naomi, it means a lot to me that you did respond at last even thought it must have been so hard on you. I'm sorry to hear what happened, and I truly hope you don't blame yourself, there was nothing you could have done *hugs*
Oh and BTW Souraya, I posted some new pics of Tina here :)
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Ann, I'm so sorry about what's been happening. It must be so hard, but you're a strong girl. You're in my thoughts....
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Ann,
I'm very sorry for your loss...it's so hard to lose someone you love so dearly. :( I'm sure your grandpa was a very special guy.
Your grandma and father may have done the right thing in keeping you away in those final moments. Five years ago, I lost my beloved grandmother. The last time I saw her, was her lifeless body in the hospital room. It was horrible, it supersedes many of the memories I have her, which is very sad to me. :(
I'm here if you need to talk...talking will help...and we are all here.
Take care.
Kelly
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Thanks...
The church went alright today actually, I didn't start crying more than once and it passed pretty quickly.
However, one thing really set me off. The obituary was in the newspaper today, and guess what?! They had misspelled names! My dad's brother's wife's name is Christin and they wrote Christina... I'm just surprised it wasn't my name cause they always tend to mess up on my name. We're complaining of course so it should be re-printed without extra charge (SHOULD be atleast).
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Oh Ann, I'm so sorry to hear about your grandpa. It is so hard losing a loved one, but as we always say, at least he is not in pain or suffering anymore.
You have to try and remember the god times. When you feel like crying, try and remember something about him that will make you smile instead. It might not stop the crying, but at least you will be able to smile through the tears. And another thing that always helps me is to remember that he would not want you to be so upset. He would want you to know that he lived a good, long life, and that he was happy to have lived long enough to see you grow up, and to be happy for the time you have had together instead of weeping for the times you won't have now that he is gone. I hope this helps because these are things that I do to make it through the first rough days. However, don't stop crying because it is good to let it all out like that too. And don't worry about crying in front of other people, especially your family, since they know how hard this all is on you.
I haven't had a chance to check your webpage yet, but can't wait to see pictures of your sweet little Kattja.
Take Care. <hugs>
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there are no words enough......my heart goes out to you.
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*hugs*
Ann, I deeply sympathize with your loss.
I lost my grandpa this year also. He was in Florida on vacation when he got sick. My parents drove down to see him but they wanted me and my sisters to stay home so we could remember him the way he was. I was very angry that they did this but now I understand.
These will be the first holidays without him and I still mourn. I miss him very much.
The grief will ease with time, but you'll always have the memories.
*hugs*