Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
So they can tippy toe together up on their prey.
Why can't politicans for once tell the truth?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
So they can tippy toe together up on their prey.
Why can't politicans for once tell the truth?
Because the truth never listens to what they have to tell.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Why don't kangaroos have horns ????
Kangaroos don't have horns because a horn doesn't fit into a kangaroo's pouch.
Why is Chicago known as the Windy City?
Quote:
Originally Posted by cassiesmom
because Oprah Wind Free lives there.
Why do men have selective hearing? :confused:
So that they mayQuote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
1. Select all the man things to listen to.
2. Select all the woman things and file them in the trash can.
Why don't women make real sense ???
Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
Well because they really do make sense, you just have ot Listen more closely to what they are saying & learn their true language. :cool:
Why do little children keep asking Why??? to everything?:eek:
Little children don't ask their fathers why, because they get sense out of them.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Little children on the other hand, ask their mothers why, because it's quicker to do that than dig for it in the trash can.
Why do hippies smell ???
Because they eat lots of garlic to stay healthy.Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
Why do the stars keep on shining?
Because they use Duracell Lithium batteries.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Why is the moon round ????
So the angels can use it for putting practice.Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
Why do golfers wear shoes with spikes on the soles?
So that the public can differentiate between golfers and gophers.Quote:
Originally Posted by cassiesmom
Why don't crocodiles eat their vegetables ??
because its a crock & their mothers told them to.Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
Why do horses have socks?
So that they can fit comfortably into their horseshoes.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Why do I have to leave right now to pick up my intoxicated daughter ????
because it is your responsibility you are her good father. (really sorry) :confused: and it is safer for her not to drive.Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
Why do our cows & calfs keep bellowing?:eek::eek::eek:
Because they like to sing!
Why do the days get shorter part of the year?
because the good old sun has decided to move south of the equator for the winter leaving us here to wonder around in the darkness.Quote:
Originally Posted by cassiesmom
Why is the moon made out of cheese?
So that the NasaRats can chew at it when they want.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Why are dogs bigger than cats ????
because dogs have to protect cats from mean cat birds.Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
Why do elephants have trunks?
Elephants have trunks so they don't have to pile everything into the back seat.
Why is it that I put pairs of dirty socks into the washing machine; but when I take the clean laundry out of the dryer, I'm always missing one sock of a pair?! I hate when that happens.
This is a common observation fault. The mind becomes confused when there is a number of socks of different colours, sizes, designs etc etc.Quote:
Originally Posted by cassiesmom
The left part of the brain stores information about the number of coloured socks, the right part stores information about the plain black and white socks, whilst the front part of the brain stores information about the socks with Mickey Mouse or Batman on them. The back part of the brain is usually dead from backhanders received from mothers who accuse you of mixing up the socks.
The simple remedy ??? Don't wash your socks. Just keep wearing them until your pets no longer wish to come near you.
How many socks do you have ??? (Not pairs....single socks.)
no socks, just paint feet to look like socks.
Why do roses smell so good?
So that when I blind hippie approaches them, he knows that he is still alone.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Why is there not a thread for "Lizard of the Day"
Because there are too many (politcians) two legged snakes crawling around.Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
Why is it humans think they are smarter then animals?
Because they can cook Swedish pancakes, and animals can't.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Why are there "knock knock" jokes ??
because there aren't any ring the door bell jokes?
Why do frogs crock?
Why do frogs croak?
They are born, they live their lives, they become old and finally croak.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Why do dogs lick people on the hand ???
because people don't always wash their hands properly.Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
Why do raccoons wear masks?
So they can hide in the woodpile and frighten whoever comes out to get wood for the fire.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Why am I not serious ????
Because life is to short & we need someone with a good sense of humor to make us laugh & giggle:DQuote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
Why am I laughing?
You're laughing because you're bored.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Why am I ticklish?
because maybe your not bored.:DQuote:
Originally Posted by cassiesmom
Why do birds grind their beaks?
Birds grind their beaks because they aren't bored!
What causes a log on the fire to snap and pop?
because its bark has been removed. :eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by cassiesmom
Why does a turkey gooble gooble?
Because he doesn't know the words :rolleyes:Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
Why does a frozen turkey require days to thaw?
Because it has severe frost bite & has to therefore be thawed out slowly.Quote:
Originally Posted by cassiesmom
Why did the eagle take priority over the turkey as our national bird?
Because eagle tetrazzini hadn't been invented yet.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
What makes a Christmas tree green?
Because envy is the problem they are green with envy.Quote:
Originally Posted by cassiesmom
Why can't I eat Snow? :cool:
You can't eat snow because it melts in your hands as well as in your mouth. :eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonny
What's the difference between hockey skates and figure skates?
Figures skates have brakes (toe picks) hockey skates don't have brakes (toe picks).Quote:
Originally Posted by cassiesmom
Why can't Santa come through the front door instead of crawling down the chimney.:confused: