Silly things kids say...

[Kfamr]

I thought it'd be funny if we had a thread where we could share stories about funny things kids say. Not necessarily funny if an adult has said it, but just amusing that such a young child would.
I thought i'd post in in the Dog house, because sometimes these same stories can be a bit disturbing It doesn't have to be your child, just a young child, relative or anything.


I'll start off-

This may be a bit sickening..
My cousin Lucas is full of these stories. They live in Michigan, his parents are divorced. My aunt(my mother's suster) came down here to visit for a while a bit back. Lucas is around 6 or so, maybe younger at the time. Well, we all went out to dinner, a bunch of our family. My aunt, cousin, and I all had to use the restroom. Lucas and my aunt went in one stall, and I went in the other. All of the sudden, I hear "Mom, why is my poop green?"... Before she could answer, in a VERY serious tone of voice, he goes " Probably because it's my favorite color."



Share some of your stories now!

[Nomilynn]

My mom was giving her one of her daycare kids bath. S/he was probably about 4. S/he was playing in the water, when S/he suddenly passed gas. S/he SHRIEKED for my mom, and she came running into the bathroom. The poor kid was white with fear.

"Mabel.." s/he says, in a shaking voice, "There are noises in my bum!" S/he was almost in tears so mom didn't want to laugh, but she said it was SOOOOO funny!!!

(Note - I can't remember which kid did this, hence the "s/he" )

[Logan]

My daughter has done the "two house" thing for a long time. She was two when her dad and I divorced.

One night he called me, very upset. Helen was probably 3-4 years old at the time. He said that their cat, "Pookie" had scratched Helen and right as it happened, Helen said "that little *itch". He demanded to know where she had learned that word!!! She had NEVER heard it from me, for sure. We later learned that a bad little girl at school said it sometime and that's where she learned it!!!!

[BitsyNaceyDog]

My friends little 3 year old boy, Isaiah, is sooo cute. If someone kisses him on the cheek he says "I'm not wiping it off, I'm ruuuuubbbbin' it innn". It's so cute, you just can't grasp it written down, I wish you could all hear it.

My other friends 2 year old- if you ask her "are you a princess?" she replies "I not a princess, I'm Alli"

I know there are more cute things, but I can't think of them right now.

[Fox-Gal]

One day my niece calls, She mad at her dad, she says he stretched her pants and now they don't fit any more. When I asked her how he did that, she says " He put them in the washer and turned it on LARGE and now they are to big."

[Cincy'sMom]

Neither if these are so much silly, but surprising things from kids..

We take the dogs to the library on Thrisday nights for a reading program with children. A few weeks ago, a young girl (about 7 or 8) was reading to Sadie and Ralph. She was reading a story about Hero dogs and one that served in WWII and died in 1945. She looks up at Ralph and says, "At least he lived to see the end of the war" (Nowhere in the book did it say what year the war ended!)

Another little girl ( about 4) was visiting with Cincy last week and was asking why she had those bumps on her belly (pimples from allergies) I told her it was allergies and she didn't understand, so I tried alittle to explain. Last night, she comes in, walks up to me and says I still don't understand allergies. I thinkshe spent all week thinking about it!!!

[CamCamPup33]

Me and my Cousin and my aunt went to this Open house for my cousin D.J's new teacher.. Mind you, he was only in kindergarten, and and he had never seen a black person because he came from the UAI, So the teacher ended up being african-american, and when the Dj, walked into the class and saw the teacher he said "Mommy, why is she that color? It must have took alot of crayon for someone to color her that black"

I wanted to fall and die! SOOO embarrassing.. lol

[Kfamr]

The same cousin, while visiting down here, he was scuffing his feet along our wooden deck.

He of course got splinters in his feet, which we had to try and get out.

During the process of us holding him down, and him crying - he screams out " Ohhhhh $h!!!!!!!!T" over and over. We tried to refrain from laughing.

[*LabLoverKEB*]

These are so funny! I love all of these stories! I just LOOOOVE little kids! They are so much fun! I'll try to think of a story! I have sooooooo many cousins!

[catnapper]

I told my mom about this thread and she told me a story about me when I was about 6....

I was in the department store with my Aunt Janet. I apparently was being a brat (me???) and Aunt Janet was telling me to behave, which made me start yelling at her. She told me that if I didn't stop that she'd smack my behind... I told her, "go ahead, I'll just scream louder." (ohhh, I'd have walloped me good for that one ) My Aunt never expected that comeback and stood there stunned for a minute before she said, "Why are you screaming? Its making everyone look at you and think you're a bad kid." And my reply? "Its my pergatory" I'm sure I meant Perrogative... but mean old Sister Mary Rita's teachings must have confused my young brain of big long P-words.

[G.P.girl]

ok i was about 7 or 8 when i said this,

A friend of my mom's was coming in to town and they went out to lunch at this cafe but my mom didn't want to leave me and my borther and sister at home alone, so she took us with her and let us play in the park next the the cafe whie they sat outside and talked and ate. well i found this stray tabby cat and her three kittens and she looked hungry so i went and asked my mom if i could have some money to go buy them some kitty food. but money was kinda tight back then adn she said no, the cat will be fine that loads of people feed them. but i kept asking and asking and finally i said (really loudly) "AWW come on! you know what it's like to be a single mother and not ave enough money to feed your three kids!" my poor mom turned bright red adn so did her friend,he just kinda looked away and pretended not to have heard. and my mom was like "now you know that's not true, don't you get enough to eat?" then she gave me the money to get the kitty food. but i still feel bad about that. it must have urt her feelings.

[DoggiesAreTheBest]

He!He!He! All those stories made me laugh. My mom tells this story about me when I was a little girl.

As my mother, aunt, and I were parking the car outside the grocery store, mom saw this lady and said: That's the ugliest woman I have ever seen!! So, while we are in the grocery store shopping, we walk by the same lady and I say: Hi ugliest lady my mom has ever seen!! You can imagine how embarrased my mom must have been! Not sure how she got out of that one!!

[Pam]

My little grandson, Christian, is two and his mom posts here as Christiansmommy. The other day she had Dale, their Greater Swiss Mountain Dog, in the kitchen behind the baby gate because she was cleaning furiously as they are in the process of selling their house and Dale was underfoot. In the middle of her cleaning she glanced in the kitchen and said "Are you being a good boy Dale?" Christian looked up from what he was doing and said "Mommy, Dale can't talk. Dale barks!" LOL! Then he said "call Nannie" because she had started laughing and he knows when he says something that makes her laugh she calls me and repeats it!

[Stenograsaurus]

My daughter was six years old at the time. We were all sitting around the table eating supper. She asked me what happens if you have sex before you get married. Needless to say Roger and I were very stunned at this question but we didn't want to make a big deal out of it. God only knows what she thinks sex is. My response was, well, you're committing a sin. Roger said, you'll go to hell. (Not that I agree with that statement.) My little girl said, well, I"m going to hell then. So I asked her why she thinks she's going to hell. She said "Because I love Jacob and we're not married yet." I said, oh, honey, love and sex are two different things. You're not going to go to hell. She said, oh, okay. Thank God she didn't ask me what sex was.

[Nomilynn]

Here is a favourite story about me my auntie Lori tells

I was about 2 or 3 I think. I was sitting in the kitchen doorway playing, and my mom was cooking dinner. She was opening a can of mushrooms and dropped them all over the floor, making a huge mess. She shouted, "Sh*t!" cleaned it up, opened more and proceded to make dinner.

When dinner was served my aunt, who lived with us, my dad and mom and I all sat down. I saw the mushrooms on the table and said, "May I have some sh*t please?" Auntie Lori started laughing and my dad blamed HER for the language, and my mom had to sheepishly admit that it was her!!!