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Thread: Life Explained

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
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    Copenhagen, Denmark
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    330

    Life Explained

    LIFE EXPLAINED

    On the first day God created the cow. God said, "You must go to the field all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of 60 years."

    The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life if you want me to live for 60 years. Let me have 20 years and I'll give back the other 40." And God agreed.

    On the second day, God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of 20 years."

    The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me 10 years, and I'll give back the other 10." So God agreed (sigh).

    On the third day God created the monkey. God said, entertain people, do monkey tricks and make them laugh. I'll give you a 20 year life span."

    The Monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for 20 years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back 10, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" And God agreed again.

    On the fourth day God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy, enjoy. I'll give you 20 years."

    Man said, "What? Only 20 years? No way. Tell you what, I'll take my 20, the 40 the cow gave back, the 10 the dog gave back and the 10 the monkey gave back. That makes 80, okay?"

    "Okay," said God. "You've got a deal."

    So that is why for the first 20 years we eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy and do nothing; for the next 40 years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next 10 years we do monkey tricks to entertain our grand-children and for the last 10 years we sit in front of the house and bark at everybody.

    Life has now been explained.

    "Peace cannot be achieved through violence,
    it can only be attained through understanding."
    Albert Einstein

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2000
    Location
    Windham, Vermont, USA
    Posts
    40,838
    What a fun story! I'll have to share that one with my Dad (he's not an online guy.)

    Where's that from?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Location
    edmonds, wa
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    2,779
    heehee

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Location
    pt.st.lucie,florida
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    Johnza,
    That is a Classic!!!!!!!
    Thanks for a Good Laugh!!!!
    and Good Insight!!!!!
    The Deli Dog

    I want to Honor All of Our Rainbow Bridge Furkids

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    18,335
    Now THAT'S funny.
    ~Kimmy, Zam, Logan, Raptor, Nimrod, Mei, Jasper, Esme, & Lucy Inara
    RIP Kia, Chipper, Morla, & June

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Tabbyville, PA
    Posts
    15,827
    ahhh. It all seems so logical! Thank you for putting a true reason behind everything!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    NJ
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    2,385
    Funny . . . now I'd like to know what kind of deal the felines arranged in order to get their NINE lives!
    AvaJoy
    =^.".^=


    Avatar courtesy of Kimlovescats . . . many thanks!
    EvErY LiFe ShOuLd HaVe NiNe CaTs

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Killearn, Scotland
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    10,746
    When you put it like that, it seems so obvious!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    Riding my bike somewhere...
    Posts
    26,408
    LOL

    ~Kay, Athena, Ace, Kiara, Mufasa, & Alice!
    "So baby take a axe to your makeup kit
    Set ablaze the billboards and their advertisements
    Love with all your hearts and never forget
    How good it feels to be alive
    And strive for your desire"

    -rx bandits

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    U.S.
    Posts
    45
    LOL! So true!

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